To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/10/13 03:18
Subject: Re: [K-list] forgiveness
From: Xerxenca
On 2004/10/13 03:18, Xerxenca posted thus to the K-list:
In a message dated 10/12/2004 9:11:31 PM Eastern Daylight Time,
sonicgoddessATearthlink.net writes:
The most important lesson that it taught me (and I had a LOT of forgiving to
do, I assure you) was that the person that you are angry with most of the
time does not think about what they did the way that you do: constantly and
with a lot of negative emotions. They maybe don't even remember the
situation, they may not remember it the way you do, they may not even care,
they may think you were the problem and not them. Thus, the only person
suffering for your difficulty to forgive is YOU. Forgiving is as much an act
taken on your own behalf as it is for the person who may or may not be
looking for your forgiveness.
This really resonates for me. I've been working on forgiveness a lot over
the years (and self-forgiveness lately) and one of the key bits has been just
giving myself permission to not hurt mySelf anymore with thoughts of what they
did "wrong" or punish myself for even having the heavy feelings. Just
breathing into them and watching them instead is a relief.
A lot of my issues and anger come out of unmet expectations - and I'm
working on acceptance of what is, just seeing what really is. Not cancelling desire
in my life but maybe trying to not to expect that they come in particular
configurations. It's pretty hard for me to do. But breathing into it and
feeling forgiveness flow into me and for me has been helping a lot.
"I am forgiven."
AM
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