To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/09/22 15:42
Subject: [K-list] Shareing my thoughts
From: Guy Johnson
On 2004/09/22 15:42, Guy Johnson posted thus to the K-list:
Dear Friends,
My practice "if one calls what I do practice, as I do everything
from a place of spontanaity and not planning" Is one of allowing and not
judging the quality of particular stimuli. I came by this in order to deal
with very intense pain from breaking my neck which is my daily fare, ever
present. There is no escape from pain except in meditation and when I come
out of the deep trance the pain is often much worse. The most effective
technique for me is to constantly surrender to both the pain and the bliss
simultaneously without attachment to either. The substance of self becomes
transparent and the full spectrum of feeling is available because nothing is
suppressed, but there is no attachment to the pain or joy of life's
existence. This does not appear attractive to the mind but for me it is the
choice that allows me to exist comfortably in my body fully aware in a state
of being and living in divine light and cosmic pleasure. For years before I
did my emotional healing and long after I had a full kundalini awakening I
lived in my intellect and spent my time empowering my third eye and capacity
of intent. Ego was hopelesssly intwined with Spirit using classic disguises
rational thinking and WILL full enforcement. There was also the obvious
access to infinate knowledge that intellect was witness to and gave me a
conviction of knowing that was unshakable I had access to what is often
referred to as the Akashic Records during this time, and all the truths
that were not in conflict with what I believed. I also lived untouched by
peoples pain. I was so engrossed in projecting light apon all that I was
unaware of their feelings and in some deep place I was judgemental at their
weekness. I knew they created their own pain as I did by my refusal to
feel for others. With the iron will I had developed in survival in my life
and the energy of kundalini I held the emotional life down with enormous
effort which manifested in bazarre accidents where I broke my back ripped
of my left foot and had to have to vertabrae in my neck fused creating much
pain later from the unnatural bending. I had no compassion for them and
none for myself, and I did not learn from just one accident. They were all
such that I had no control over them. they were just happenings.
After my reluctant recognition of the importance of emotions and a
recognition that by denieging emotions, my life was being run by them in
bazare exaguration with the magnfied capacity to manifest on a personal
level due to the raging kundalini anergy, my beliefs came to include the
feminine, I identified my patterns of beliefs and actions and dared to
reexperience and let go of my deep anger and emotional attatchments to
those fears causing anger, toward all authority and everything feminine,
along with a host of other ways of habitual living, eventualy surrendering
everthing and filling myself with love and compassion.
I was amazed to discover that with the surrender of all my beliefs I
was able to experience the Akashic records in an entirely new way. The
knowledge had no limitations without the ones I had imposed by my beliefs.
Even if the beliefs are correct they exclude a vast wealth of knowledge
available for observation by an intellect unconfined by limitations of any
kind. Here the truth of existence is not seperate from the existence of the
individual whose mind is no longer confined by emotional knee jerk
reactions or even language and the pervasive ramifications caused by baseing
thought on seperation and disection of all things rather then the union of
all things.
DISCLAIMER!
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