To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/09/11 18:47
Subject: RE: [K-list] i'm an agry kundalite
From: Rick Mayweather
On 2004/09/11 18:47, Rick Mayweather posted thus to the K-list:
Accept the anger as a path to learning compassion for yourself. Don't be so
hard by being overcritical. Your important and you need to give yourself a
break to cut down on the mind noise.
Try to see this experience as the most valuable learning lesson that you
need at this point in your evolution. Use it wisely, because it is a
valuable gift. Please re-read. When you can see the divine at work,
everything changes.
>so, 2 months ago i got this phone call from a good friend i havn't talked
>to in a long wile, she left a message. my life was a mess in az, the place
>i was working was going to all hell, my parents were seperating, now
>devorcing, my friends had all moved away, or fell into some kind of hole,
>or were involved in group sex activites, and i thought i was looking for
>love??
ok so there is a lot of change going on, change in my experience is always
for the better but may not seem like it at the time.
>when i finally talked to this friend who called, my life suddenly changed.
>i couldn't sleep anymore, back underwater?? k energys seemed almost life
>threatening again, but i knew the drill?? and it wasn't unusuall for me to
>experiance k like that during that time peroid.
How does the Kundalini seem life threatening ? Perhaps it was your minds
interpretation of the unknown scared you because you did'nt have the
intellectual understanding to handle the experience so fear took a grip on
you and you became paralysed ?
You knew the drill, you mean your mind is stuck in an infinite feedback
loop, in other words your deep in unconscious and you want to break free.
When the Kundalini is awakened, it is always there, sometimes we're
conscious of it and sometimes not.
>i think i was sitting in my room? or in the living room, and i saw this
>pink rush!! i felt energy step into my life, and something change and open.
> suddenly i see i can just leave. i could leave my life behind...move to a
>new state, change everything.
You can change right now, do you choose to do so ?
2 seconds later, you can change it right now, do you choose to do so ?
4 seconds later, you can change it right now, do you choose to do so ?
>now i get here, and the energy is telling me i wont find work,
I don't think it is. I think your mind is telling you this based upon past
conditioning, your mind is polluting your consciousness(egoic identity), it
happens to us all.
>i cant get a job.
You can get a job !
>the energy makes me lazy
There is nothing wrong with taking rest, this is a normal function. Eat,
sleep, rest, sex, work, play, these are all normal. Society try's to stop
rest and labels people as lazy because society is constructed from that mind
noise, it does'nt like quietness, peace, tranquility.
If you mean surrerndering, then that's different.
>and i can never come off right when i talk to employers. everything always
>starts on the wrong foot, and K has already done this to me once before.
Try an interview on the other foot.
Also meditate before your next interview.
>so i'm sitting here wondering, as i run out of money. how many more times K
>is going to push me back to AZ. and why she pushed me here in the first
>place? and why it happened the first time 2 year ago..and if i'm going to
>go brain dead again, like i did last time, dying in a bus, going insane to
>wake up another forgotten part of myself?
Maybe understanding the reason does'nt really matter. What matters is your
internal destination, not your physical locality. Although it's been my
experience that some physical locations make it much easier to reach
internal destinations because there are many more growth experiences
available that accelerate inner states of consciousness (growth) than
others.
>i tell you. i am spiritually being butt fucked.
Ask God to wear a condom. Better still, work with the frustration inside
you. I read that anger is repressed sexual energy, it takes time and hard
work, but try to find an outlet for it.
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