To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/08/26 23:04
Subject: [K-list] Re: new to list kundalini and insomnia
From: PJM
On 2004/08/26 23:04, PJM posted thus to the K-list:
Deesutra:
Thanks for sharing your expereince with me - for me too it seems to be
exacerbated by sleeplessness - the energy in my head and the upper part of
my body just feels worse. There is a theme of letting go that runs through
all the responses that I have had, and that is something I am trying to take
to heart. However, I have not quite yet given up my wish to go back to
"normalcy". Only time will tell if that is possible. Interesting how
you've had it come and go over the years.
My deepest thanks
Paul
----- Original Message -----
From: <diamondsutraATnetidea.com>
To: <pjm1ATsurfglobal.net>
Cc: <k-listATkundaline-gateway.org>
Sent: Wednesday, August 25, 2004 6:11 PM
Subject: new to list kundalini and insomnia
>
> Hello Paul:
>
> I can relate to your story. That symptom of sleeplessness is one that
> ruled my life in the early years of kundalini.
>
> I had been with Osho Rajneesh for 11 years, over-doing his many
> meditations, some incredibly active. Also I had been practicing yoga for
a
> good 10 years everyday, as well as strenuous physical workouts and loads
of
> dancing and then I did a lot of psychic readings in the afternoons. After
> osho died I was with Barry Long, in Australia, for 3 years by l991 when
this
> kundalini energy started running my life.
>
> The symptoms were rampant and took over my entire physical. Fortunately
at
> that time a woman M.D. who is a deep meditator came into my life and
worked
> with me and identified the kundalini. She also had other kundalini
patients
> at the time. She has assisted me all these years and is now a doctor and
a
> friend as well as a fellow traveller.
>
> The first 4 years the "symptoms" were so rampant that all I could barely
do
> was hang on, while slowing down and letting go. Every aspect of my life
> changed. Everything had to be let go of: expectations, work, love life,
> living space, sleep, eating and on and on.
>
> My will had to be surrendered entirely to God's will. Looking at it
now I
> can see that everytime the energy "stabilized" a bit I would then endeavor
to
> do some 'old" thing that I had done in the past and the symptoms would
> immediately "burn me up."
>
> I had found such a sweet stability and then last year I got involved in
a
> 5 month love relatedness in which I practiced tantrik love-making again
and,
> when that was over, the fire had returned and one its greatest symptom was
> sleeplessness.
>
> I have not had a natural nights sleep since my birthday late last
December.
> For a long time I was using chinese herbal sleeping pills. Right now I
am
> using the for me, "dreaded pharmaceutical" a muscle relaxer, flexoril. I
> also use chinese herbal medications all day to keep the fire down and to
ease
> the heart. I am also using chinese herbal medications for the over- taxed
> nerves, and for insomnia. I take these during the day but right now they
do
> not cause sleep. so I take the flexoril (1/2 tablet) before bed with a
cup
> of tension tamer tea.
>
> I also have to be very quiet during the day, not see too many or most
times
> any at all people and stay off the telephone. If I do too much of the
> aforementioned, the energy "revs" particularly in my head.
>
> I would not mind the sleeplessness except if I don't sleep it feels the
> next day as though my head is going to blow off. I find I will finally
drift
> off into sleep if I don't take the meds around 4 am, but then I sleep all
day
> until 4pm the next day. I have consulted with different doctors on this
and
> the consensus, after x-rays is---its energy. This from doctors who know
> nothing of "kundalini"
>
> For me this awakening is really walking the "razor's edge", continually
> requiring utter surrender to what is and keeping my own will and
willfulness
> out of life.
>
> The initial settling of energy required acupuncture needles regularly,
> this was the biggest help for me; as well as much massage, chiropractic,
> chinese herbs, long soaks in the local hotsprings, complete slowing down
and
> homeopathics. It appears to me that each being has to find their own way
> here, in relation to the energy, however, I trust this is of some help to
you.
>
> Lord knows I don't know what is going on but have endeavored to relate
my
> story and my understanding of it in some way close to what happened using
> these words.
>
> I send this in case it is of any help to you.
>
> Love and blessings, deesutra
>
>
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