To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/05/22 01:30
Subject: [K-list] clarification
From: prahalad purple
On 2004/05/22 01:30, prahalad purple posted thus to the K-list:
Hey,
I am new here, 25 years old, and I find from the
ongoing discussions that there are quite a few
spiritually scholar-ed people here. This has
encouraged me to seek some answers here.
I never really understood the deviant neuromuscular
control, which seemed abnormal, in me. It was a source
of amusement to me and others. For example being able
to move one eye ball and one ear at a time at will.
Also I had extremely strong sexual desires from as
young as 5 year old. As I grew, I experienced weird
sensations, which were triggered from will, inside my
body. Until one day I suddenly experienced a sudden
surge of electric orgasmic sensations in my head
accompanied by viewing spiraling light around a dusky
circle with my heart beating extremely rapidly. The
next thing was feeling totally in heaven, light and
cool and as blissful as it can get.
Didn´t know what it was. After clarifying that I did
not have a tumor or a brain related disorder, my
curiosity led me towards religion. Here most of what I
was feeling had been described. But still I was
without a guide and followed where my heart guided me.
I do not do any complex exercises like mudras or hatha
yoga , and neither do I know exactly what meditation
is. and I am not at all familiar with the technical
terms. I just close my eyes and drown in the silent
vibration that I feel in my head and body.
Sometime back as I did this I heard sounds like
gnmm-gnommmm-gnommm. The sounds came only when I
“meditated’ (If I may call that), in a particular way
at a particular place in my head (I don´t know what
else to call that). I have been trying to read and
learn by myself as I have not been lucky enough to get
a teacher.
My question:
Nowadays as I meditate, (if I may call it that) I feel
bubbles of mild yet emphatic “electric’ sensations
going from my spine on to my head. As I let it loose
in my head, I feel intense sexual like feeling in me
head , It feels like my whole body is the phallus and
my head is the head of the phallus with that same
feeling and intensity as one would feel at the phallus
head during sexual stimulation. This however has
nothing to do with my sexual desire at all or sexual
arousal, which is completely independent..
I am perplexed and don´t know anything about this. I
have tried hard to find mention/ explanation about
this, searching a plethora of books and sites, but....
:(.
It would be very good if some one could let me know
more about this or a place from whichI could get info
.
Thanx,
Prahal
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