To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/03/22 00:21
Subject: Re: [K-list] No Desire
From: Ron Whitaker
On 2004/03/22 00:21, Ron Whitaker posted thus to the K-list:
Rick,
We are on the same wavelength again as we have many times in the past. We
both I believe have been through long periods of the dark night of the soul
but this somehow feels different. Yes there is an emptiness in my life but
a fullness right beside it. Yet no desire. I have gone to the extent to
make lists of all the possible activities I could and should do. I choose
the ones that interest me the most and pick a small task that would be the
next step. Sometimes I am able to take a step but frequently I am lost and
just go meditate, sometimes fill the brain with noise of the TV, flick
flick. It is like the dark night in that there is nothing worth while doing
but doesn't contain the sense of depression. The have had, lately, great
long states of contentment with whatever is happening but suddenly it steps
into the lost desirelessness. I have somehow felt the ego is somehow
connected and invalidating aspects of my life and removing an innate desire
that may come naturally from deep inside me. The ego I know has lost the
control to direct my life through senseless desires. I can easily identify
an ego desire and simply ignore it - very freeing. Could it be that this
desireless state is another attempt for the ego to gain control by
cancelling instead of the normal addition? Just thinking out loud. I
cannot simply stop mediation for a while. If I sit with nothing meditation
takes over. It is still the most pleasant thing to do - even sometimes
clears the way for attention to something and activity starts again.
Please continue this thread, it is very important to get to the bottom of
this. It has been with me months now.
Thanks all,
Ron
----- Original Message -----
From: "Rick Mayweather" <rick_mayweatherAThotmail.com>
To: <k-listATKundalini-Gateway.org>
Sent: Saturday, March 20, 2004 2:40 PM
Subject: [K-list] No Desire
>
>
>
>
>
> Or specifically lack of desire i'm struggling to understand what's going
on.
> It's very disorientating.
>
> What is desire anyway ? I can't define it adequately.
>
> I see a nice woman and feel nothing. No desire. She brushes past me and
I
> feel little, this
> really concerns me but at the same time explains a lot of the issues in my
> life.
>
> I have no desire to go anywhere, no desire to do anything, even desire to
> seek is fading, it's
> the last straw. I just sit and meditate, nothing else matters. Every so
> often a spark of
> desire arises, I become conscious of it and it then vanishes.
>
> Buddha says desire and attachment are the cause of all suffering, so
that's
> great, some
> self validation that i'm on the right path.
>
> Is desire replaced by Self connected to the Great Spirit, who guides us,
or
> is this a false
> understanding. How can life function without desire ?
>
> Is "desire" and "sensual desire" the same thing ?
>
> Are there resources out there that can help me out here, or anyone ?
>
> I feel lost.
>
> BTW, perhaps this discussion / teaching on desire could be added to here
> eventually if it's of use.
>
> http://www.kundalini-teacher.com/
>
> _________________________________________________________________
>
>
>
>
>
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