To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/02/17 19:45
Subject: FW: Re: [K-list] Humbled forwarded from morgan
From: l p
On 2004/02/17 19:45, l p posted thus to the K-list:
>From: Morgan Kochel <areswolfATmac.com>
>To K-List:
>
>Since some of you have made me aware that "Mystress" is still reacting to
>me even when I'm off the list, I thought I'd pop in and clarify a few
>things.
>
>Mystress, you may want to consider there being other interepretations to
>the first conclusions you so readily jump to...
>
>> My comment about your asking for help more often than you offer it,
>>triggered this issue in you, big time...but it is your issue.
>
>You say that your comment "triggered" something in me. I say that, if
>anything, it triggered a natural "dislike" for someone attempting to
>belittle another by making them feel guilty about asking help. I'm not too
>impressed with your "loving tough-bitch" persona, either. It is common for
>folks on their "high and mighty" to play such word games and projections
>with those they perceive "below them" in order to maintain their perceived
>control. Since I have never seen even a modicum of humility from you on
>this list, I can say with some assurance that you have fallen into a HUGE
>ego trip with this list. Particularly since you write such lengthy letters
>to me once you know I've unsubbed.
>
>Sadly, there are some here who are following you right along, but as you
>say on your website, those people who just LOVE you to torture them give
>you something quite special. It's a hard ego-trip/addiction to break.
>
>> My comment was really related to something a little bit different...
>>Your not reading the list guidelines is disrespectful of the community.
>>Your complaints about the reply-to "hassle" are an effort to control, and
>>show ingratitude to the list moderators, and those who have helped you.
>>"Resentment of debt."
>
>It seems to me that you blew my little comments WAY out of proporation.
>While I admit I was the only one vocal about this list's inefficiencies as
>compared to other lists out there, it was only done tongue-in-cheek, and
>then only to demonstrate my awareness of some irritability issues I was
>going through at the time. YOU chose to take offense to it and turn it
>into some imagined power play.
>
>I wouldn't DREAM of attempting to make you change your list, Mystress, and
>I certainly wouldn't DREAM of ever writing to you privately again since
>this issue is so sensitive for you. My bad, and I apologize.
>
><snip of long intellectual explanation of chakras>
>
>> Intellectual knowing is part of ego, it is prideful.
>
>Agreed. :-)
>
>> An ego that believes itself to be a "spiritual person" is still an
>>ego... and it can be worse, because with that ego the shadow side is more
>>deeply repressed than in an average person.
>
>Hm. Would you say, then, that someone who calls themselves "Mystress",
>"kundalini-awakened", and who continually attempt to "teach" others without
>ever admitting their own human foibles to be expressing more spirit or more
>ego? It seems to me that *you* got upset here, and getting upset comes
>from not getting one's way. Ego.
>
>> The "spiritual person" is unaware of what the shadow is up to, and to
>>maintain the self image, they project their negative perceptions onto
>>others... while managing not to notice their own controlling, abusive
>>behavior... or going even farther, and blaming others for how they feel
>>and react.
>
>Ah. You're behavior is making more sense now. Thanks for the
>clarification.
>
>> Nobody but you and Goddess can control how you choose to react to
>>anything. Blaming others for your reactions, is a vampiric power game, of
>>the power chakra.
>
>So, by my suggesting an incredibly small change to the list, only to meet
>with an email tirade from you, and now this defensive one to the list, it
>means you're engaged in vampirism? Really, I don't think you should be so
>hard on yourself. A simple apology would do -- and then we can all get
>back to being *real people* here, as opposed to comic-book characters.
>
>> I'm not angry, or superior. I write from the Witness state, which is
>>devoid of emotion, but also very honest and direct. Telling it like it is.
>>From the witness, there are no boundaries, no sense of self... no ego. It
>>is a state of unconditional love... and to be in it, feels like nothing.
>>Peace, only. Unconditional love it unemotional, emotions would be a
>>*condition.*
>
>You have shown time and time again on this list that you do, indeed, still
>have an ego. Snide remarks (and I have several examples from your last
>email) do not come from a place of "the Witchess state". (How many people
>here are snowed by this?) For example:
>
>> I do have a talent for control and manipulation, of course! I was a
>>professional dominatrix for many years, earning my living from using the
>>talent, consensually.
>
>What part of you needs to continually remind others about this, via this
>e-list, your attitude, your constant reminders, and an entire website with
>(fergodsakes) videos of yourself dressed in leather spouting attitude to
>the camera?? If we are all One, why do you believe you're so special?
>
>> I also have discernment in application... and a clear cut knowledge of
>>limits. I can tell you from enormous experience, exactly how much power I
>>have, to control how another person will think, react or feel:
>>
>> NONE AT ALL.
>
>Have you dealt with the heart chakra lately? Control over others isn't
>anything to be proud of. We are all equal. We are all One. The need to
>control comes from the fear of not being in control.
>
>And to those who believe they need control -- relax. Your Divine Soul is
>within, not in any "mystress". Don't be afraid to take control of your
>life. No one but you can tell you what you need, where you are in life,
>and where you need to go. Others can sometimes point the way, but NEVER
>look at another person as your god. Doing so affirms the Me/Them
>dichotomy, and that is exactly what the Journey to Divine is about
>awakening from!
>
>> Not unless they allow it, and even then the responses can be
>>unpredictable. Therefore I have no expectations of control. Similarly, I
>>know that someone blaming me for how they feel, is illusion, a power game
>>of victimhood. What they describe is impossible. Free Will is Goddess Law.
>>
>> Morgan, yes, you are controlling and manipulative, and if you like I
>>will support you, by going though your last post, line by line and naming
>>each control drama you used.
>
>I never denied that I can be controlling and manipulative, so it would be
>rather pointless. You are not my teacher. I came to this list to meet
>others going through Kundalini awakenings, and I have met quite a few
>helpful, intelligent people here. You, on the other hand, seems to have
>assumed that I want your constant criticism in my life. I'm not a
>submissive, and if you can't deal with that, I'll go elsewhere.
>
>> My offer, is based in *compassion.*
>
>Compassion is given with love, not accusations or unasked-for judgments.
>You see anger when you read my emails, though I sit here with a smile on my
>face, laughing at the absurdity of arguing with myself! Mystress, drop the
>shield and come down here with us mere humans!
>
>> You know, I see my younger self, in you... it moves me to compassion,
>>not anger. Namaste, love.
>
>LOL!! That's just proof of the Cosmic Mirror. I see you the same way!
>LOL!
>
>> I know, most likely you have read this with a prickly attitude of
>>anger at my apparent confidence in my diagnosis of you. Your fear and
>>prejudice of my sexual orientation gets your back up with that "I'm not
>>your submissive" crap... I have not invited you to be my sub, it is an
>>honor rarely given. It is your stuff, your fear... it is not what I'm
>>about. I already have more people asking to be my sub than there are hours
>>in a day, and I certainly would not want to deal with such a difficult one
>>as you would be.
>
>My gawd, Mystress, your "assessment" couldn't be farther from the truth.
>In the 1970's and 1980's, living in California as a young legal secretary
>in the Bay Area with the wildest night life you can imagine, there's little
>if anything you could shock me with. I walked in Gay Pride Parades and
>worked in AIDS clinics, and before that slept with every rock star that
>came through Oakland Stadium, and you say you KNOW ME and that I'm
>"prejudiced" against your little leather-power game? It's all a GAME,
>woman! If you need so badly to win, YOU WIN, okay? LOL.
>
>Nope, no ego in Mystress' above paragraph at all. Nope, uh-uh. LOL! Let
>me know when I start to feel the prickly attitude you say I'm feeling,
>because at the moment my heart is aching for you! And I'm really hoping
>that the comment about how many are subbing to your list is not in reaction
>to how many people are writing to me offlist to tell me they're leaving!
>Oh, my. *chuckle*
>
>> Truth is, I do know your spiritual progress better than you do. You do
>>not even know that your current stuff is all power chakra related.
>
>My crown is tingling, my heart is warm and wanting to reach out to you, and
>I'm laughing hysterically. I like this power chakra! LOL!
>
>> I do not seek unquestioning obedience, from anyone. Not even my
>>slaves. I encourage discussion.
>
>As long as you agree with it.
>
>Mystress, I don't know how we'll ever get beyond this point. I will never
>accept your supposed omniscience. Not you, or anyone else, will ever know
>me better than myself. You will NEVER know anyone on this list better than
>they know themselves.
>
>Every great guru from Jesus to Buddha to Krishna had humility, and it was
>that humility that was seen as a strength by their students. That is what
>you're missing, and until you learn to develop it, you will only attract
>those who support your goddess-game and no real work will get done. Come
>down to earth, and we can all hold hands and experience the Joy of
>Kundalini the way it was given to us.
>
>And despite it all, I knew *exactly* what you were trying to do with your
>dominatrix thing -- and I think it's a great idea! But there are pitfalls,
>and you may have found one.
>
>
>Namaste,
>Morgan
>
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