To: K-list
Recieved: 2004/01/11 03:50
Subject: RE: [K-list] My Story (my last post)
From: Rich
On 2004/01/11 03:50, Rich posted thus to the K-list:
Ben,
> Well i have always belonged to a church named Self Realization
> Fellowship. And a few years ago i awoke my kundalni in deep meditation. I
> had intense good and also not so good experiences. In the beginning i felt
> intense stinging pain and such, like i was being electrocuted. Just an
> example of my symptoms. But eventually my kundalini mellowed out, with the
> help of a little medication, and i began to live a relatively normal life.
That's nice.
> But i was deeply empty inside, i craved bliss.
Some suggest that Kundalini is bliss when unobstructed.
> I wanted higher states of
> consiousness and i wanted them now. But i was not getting them here. So i
> left the kundalini-list.
You might have found them within yourself?
> However i had it convinced in my mind that i was
> different, because my kundalini was awakened.
Same, same but different. Sometimes I feel ordinary. Like life is the way
it's meant to be.
> I thought that the normal
> spiritual path my peers went through was totally different, that i could
> not
> experience devotion, etc.
Devotion to what? Are you looking outside or inwards?
> For the next months that followed i struggled
> here
> and there with different things, and a highly advanced yogi who belongs to
> SRF helped me. He helped me rid the idea that the kundalini was the only
> way
> i could get to enlightenment, and that we, the soul, are beyoned the
> kundalini.
Kundalini is not finite or limited. I may suggest, and it is a suggestion
that a sense of enlightenment may come from letting kundalini devour your
sense of self.
Strangely I killed a mosquito the other day and as it fell to the floor I
noticed this tiny lightness float upwards in a wavering motion to the
ceiling. I was convinced it was another mosquito and then it just seemed to
disappear. Of course it could have been the toxicity of the mosquito
repellent giving me hallucinations.
> Well eventually i slowly started to find what i was seeking.
When I stop looking sometimes what I need is right in front of me.
I
> eventually destroyed the thought that i could not have devotion, and
> started
> developing it.
Trying to manage these things is unwise when you having infinite wisdom
within you. Kundalini takes you there through surrendering to it.
> Keep in mind God could give any one of us, blissful
> samadhi at this moment if he wished.
Why would 'he' wish not? Why would 'he' wish?
What is the resistance to feeling this blissful Samadhi?
> Why not rely on God who is inifnite
> bliss, to fulfill you?
Good idea! My girlfriend seems kind of absent these days. Too busy getting
'full' in her head and making herself sick from doing too much of what she
isn't enjoying.
But who is this god? And does this god differ to the Kundalini you talk of?
> Iam now at the point where i don't care about the
> body, whether it has a awakened kundalini, or any of its characteristics,
> i
> only care in pleasing God.
Godliness is next to cleanliness. Or something likes that. But lets be real,
we should take care of the body or it won't be fit to please God.
(Thinking I should do some exercise)
> And i spend my life doing this. I tell you my
> life is a joy. Yes there are troubles and such but i would not trade my
> life
> for anyone elses.
Could you if you wanted to?
I'd temped to try for a day... Any volunteers?
(Only requirement must be good looking!)
> Now i know not everyones path is going to be the same as
> mine, but i now know Ramakrishna is right, loving God is the easiest path.
Being water is the easiest path. It can only follow the confines of it's
surroundings. It cannot escape but by blending in to pools and puddles, it
feels a part of the whole water. Water is a slave to gravity, it has narrow
choice in its direction. Occasionally water gets picked up by the rays of
the sun as it finds itself spaciously evaporating into the jet stream plane
atmosphere of the 7th altitude.
> It is true whether one has an awakened kundalini or whether one doesn't.
> All
> paths lead to the same goal.
Some paths go in circles. Others up hills. Some to elsewhere, some to
nowhere.
(contemplating pathlessness)
r
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