To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/12/10 04:06
Subject: Re: [K-list] Jesus was an activist
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2003/12/10 04:06, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
Can't even be bothered to snip, eh? ... and several of your posts came
to me and to the list.
At 03:17 PM 09/12/03, David Bozzi wrote:
>Angelique
>try owning this psychosis
>
>Claim it as your very own...
Heh, what a funny idea of me you have... you don't know me, you have
been away. I am no-one's hero. I did that game to death, played hierarchy
games to extremes most never encounter, and wore out under the weight of
the projections and responsibility. No thanks, no more. Keep the pedestals
yourself, if you still enjoy them, I have had enough to last a lifetime.
I never wanted to become a healer, I became one by coercion of my
empathic sensitivity. Helping others ease their pain was the only way to
stop feeling their pain, in myself. I am basically, a selfish creature.
Now, that is mostly passed, empathy under control, and I find myself quite
unwilling to be a slave to the karma of others. To be sovereign in myself
is still relatively new, and a blissful luxury. There are ways to heal,
without empathy... but less motive.
After my self realization I saw clearly that perfection is what IS.
Goddess in everything, everyone, and no-one needed me... but they thought
they did, and called to me to resume the role of teacher, healer, guide...
and so after a while, I did, partly because I could not think of anything
better to do. Seemed a waste of a life, to do nothing. Got too caught up in
it, a few times... but that has passed.
I have never held any one job for more than six years. I have been
counselling K people since 1995, managing this list since 1996. I enjoy the
company, but ... it does not move me as it once did.
I rarely post to any list, anymore. This place has had the lighthouse
reset to "satsangh" because I have no interest for it to be a Kundalini
emergency ward. There are plenty of others to do that work now, and they
can have it. The co-moderators handle most of the questions, much of my
personal email gets no response. Goddess has it handled.
My work with my few clients is light, mostly tummo initiations, and I
tell them straight up that they do not need me, and the focus is on
teaching them that the power is within them, not in me. Some choose not to
believe it, not much I can do about that... but I decline the projections
of savior, refer them elsewhere if that is their attachment. Responsibility
belongs to Goddess", that attitude shields me from karma and savior
projections, sticking.. that, and transparency. So peaceful, to be
nothing. Most of my clients are healers, counsellors and psychiatrists.
Sane, stable people who do not seek a hero, just some small guidance or
insight.
Had a funny session recently, the client believed me self realized but
he would not believe it about himself. He had read too many scriptures, and
had expectations about it being so grand and glorious... would not believe
that it feels ordinary... that it feels, like he feels. Nothing for me to
do, about that.
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