To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/10/14 14:13
Subject: RE: [K-list] Fear for Kali
From: Rita Metermaid
On 2003/10/14 14:13, Rita Metermaid posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Rich, Hi Elargonauto, All Friends -
I wrote a longer reply and then decided not to send
it. :-)
I've put a few remarks interspersed below, but what i
want to say first is that i'm grateful you two didn't
let this die prematurely. What you've written here has
a very healing feel.
--- Rich <ulterium AT_NOSPAM barrysworld.com> wrote:
<snip>
> The top hit when I googled 'kali goddess' was the
> following: Kali, Goddess of Fear 'Kali, Goddess of
Fear. I am the dance of death that is. behind all
> life. the ultimate horror. the ultimate ecstasy. I
> am existence....'
>
<snip>
>
> 'She is Smyama Kali, the Dark One who dispels fear'
> - Merlin Stone, Ancient Mirrors of Womanhood
>
> My knowledge is Kali being all things. Being of
> destruction and death. Darkness lived.
>
> Strangely I find a reassurance in this. That death
> is life in it's own shape
> and form. There isn't so greater difference other
> than that we are here and
> less conscious to there. It's a place of its own,
> woven into existence as is
> the light. Now I think of fear as being dispersed
> and light as centred.
> Nothing to be feared (i.e. running away from), only
> to be experienced.
All of the above resonates, and it's wonderful that
you have replaced the fear with light. Very happy for
you. :-)
>
<snip>
> In my perspective it is held Trauma that keeps the
body fears on simmer ready for instant-replay.
Absolutely!
<snip>
> I guess there are two sides. Clear the fear/trauma
and have no response or notice the response but don't
intervene.
"Clear the fear" - catchy slogan for a book? And the
thing is, it works. Clear the trauma as one approach.
And adapt a mindfulness approach to watching the fear
arise and then dissipate.
<snip>
>Hope you don't mind the humour... Got tired of taking
this seriously.
<giggle>
Somewhere, on a different list, i read a story about
fears. Nasrudin would always carry a box with him when
he went drinking in his favorite tavern. The bartender
asked him what was in the box. Nasrudin replied that
whenever he drinks in that bar, he always sees so many
snakes on the floor, so be brings a mongoose in the
box to kill the snakes. The bartender tells him
"That's ridiculous, there are no snakes in here, they
aren't real." Nasrudin replies, "That's ok, the
mongoose isn't real either."
We have these imagined fears, and all of these
imaginary protections and defenses against them,
sometimes, don't we... No need to carry around the
defenses once we let ourselves know that the fear is
imagined, too.
But of course, if the fear comes from real,
deep-seated Trauma, then we need to clear that,
first... Not hide it or dress it up as something else.
But let it go.
People talk about having no expectations - i think
they *usually* talk in the context of an expectation
as a *want* about some future thing, maybe? But there
is another sense of expecation that *some* of us have
- the expectation that something from the past will
continue to haunt us. But it won't if we are brave
enough and patient enough and love ourselves enough...
And as you said, sometimes it takes a jack-hammer to
help clear away the stuff, and lots of TLC, too...
Sometimes it takes a friend holding the jackhammer and
our ability to trust that person's instincts... And
lots of patience. That's happened for me, and i feel
grateful... I'm mostly fearless (there's still one
lurking around the perimeter, of course, and i'll
capture it sooner rather than later) and it feels much
better than before.
love,
rita
> Rich
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