To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/05/06 09:54
Subject: Re: [K-list] RE: Cycling of the Kundalini - Karma
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2003/05/06 09:54, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
At 12:57 PM 28/04/03, Charles wrote:
>Over the last couple of months I have been experiencing what has seemed to
>be locked fascet joints in my thorasic spine around my heart area. Regular
>visits to an osteopath have provided nothing more than brief relief from this
>pain as 24 hours after the structural manipulations to correct the imbalance,
>they have returned each time.
I get that too, sometimes. Chiropractic helps...
>At first I thought that the muscles in this area had become used to holding
>my misaligned spine and have therefore just pulled the joints back out of
>position as a result of habit. Further treatments including CranioSacral
>therapy, deep massage, visceral manipulation, emails on this list and my own
>intuition have shown me that this imbalance is not merely a structural issue
>but more likely karmic blockages around my heart chakra. I feel now that the
>next stage in my journey revolves around surrendering and clearing this karma
>for the kundalini to continue its journey. I have suspected for some time
>that I have experienced a top down awakening and how that could relate to my
>issues here I am not sure.
For me, the cause is partly physical... bad computer posture whilst
writing, spending time out of body. My whole family uses chiropractors,
and I once asked one why...he said it is because we have long spines. For
example, the distance between the top of my hip and the bottom of my rib is
about 5 inches, an unusually long waist. Just like how a tall thin tree is
more likely to be twisted or broken in the wind, than a short fat one.
Spiritual causes sometimes seem to be vampiric attachments... people
who want your love energy but are afraid to face you and ask for it, will
attach siphon hoses to the back of the chakras, especially the heart and
power chakras. I have written many times about how to clear them. Do a
search on Aka cords. I find the google search engine is sometimes more
useful than the one on the gateway site.
Lately I have been clearing cords by pulling them upwards from the
middle till they snap... attaching my end to my higher self and the end
coming from the person who is making the attachment, to their higher
self... Goddess has it handled.
I often get this sort of backache when I attend Pagan events. Right
between the shoulder blades, behind the heart. It is partly bad posture,
sitting on stumps around the fire I tend to slouch... and partly that the
Magickal circle makes a type of tantric unity, so I end up getting a lot of
other folks stuff. Most pagans are spiritually awakened but not K.
awakened, so they practice free will based magic not surrender. In Tantric
unity, water finds it's own level. I often end up sick or sleeping for days
after a multi-day event, processing.
Recently I was working with my favorite healer, and she told me the
cause of the ache was Pagan folks projecting who they want me to be,
literally pushing their ideas about me into the back of my heart. She had a
similar experience, and she eventually stopped hanging around Pagans. They
assume their magic is the same as mine, but since my energy is brighter
than theirs, since I have more abundance and power, they comfort
themselves with ideas about how I must be "cheating" somehow. Some kind of
black magic vampire... not realizing that the difference is really that my
spiritual beliefs are surrender based, Goddess provides.
The last event I attended, druid and I announced that we had bought a
house, and I was astonished at the jealousy I felt from them.
I have had a few pagan friends who know me better, and they are
surprised at how others describe seeing me... they do not see me, but
themselves reflected. They do not own their stuff, so they project it...
and in the unity, I accept it.
That was the root issue within me, the cause within myself. I tend to
take too much responsibility for the well being of the people around me. If
they do not take much responsibility for their own results, then it is
unbalanced. I am interested in how people see me. I cannot see myself,
so... even though what they see, is usually more reflective of who they are
than me, but it is interesting nevertheless.
Having located the source and made adjustments, this past Beltaine
long weekend camping with my pagan friends, was pretty much pain-free. I
felt the pain for perhaps 1 hour out of 40, after sitting on a bench with
no back support.
>How do I discover what the karmic issues are in this area?
Well, you have had quite an opening, since you wrote this... Goddess
provides!
>Do you recommend the Fire Serpent Tantra course?
Always... but not necessarily for this! ;)
>Are there other ways I could help myself? I
>suspect that I have heart chakra issues around 'receiving' although I'm not
>sure.
If a blockage cannot be removed by simple surrender, then usually it is
because Goddess won't take it because you are not done with it yet, it is a
gift for you. Information about your ineffective patterns, so you can make
a conscious choice to change.
It can be useful to travel into the blockage to see what you can see.
Find the soul-spark that is your seat of consciousness, and imagine it
moving into the blockage. Relax and observe your thoughts, visions,
emotions without attaching to them or trying too hard to analyze. The
meaning will come to you, later.
Sometimes simply placing the soul energy into the blockage from a state
of surrender, is enough to break it up and wash it away.
> I work full time as a healing facilitator and this physical pain the
>area of my heart chakra began when I started to do extensive healing work.
Yes, it would. People are wanting more from you than you are able to
give... wanting you to be their full time savior... and you are
compassionate, so you allow the connections... but really, they do not
serve. They have to find the Divine source within themselves... and you
need to focus more on Namaste. Seeing the Divine in them, and knowing that
their problems are perfection, the soul's choice to experience. They are
Gods of their own lives, whether they know it or not... give responsibility
for who they are over to that, instead of taking so much of it on yourself.
>I work 2 days a week for a charity called The Disability Foundation offering
>Thai Yoga Massage and CranioSacral therapy to people with disabilities...
>quite often complex diabilities that I had no knowledge of before I started
>working there. It has certainly been a journey into the unknown for me and
>working regularly with people who have suffered spinal breaks and children
>with cerebral palsy as well as young adults with advanced MS has certainly
>challenged me on an emotional level. To a certain extent I feel I have taken
>this work in my stride however I am aware that this must be taking an
>empathic toll on some level. Perhaps this is showing up in my heart chakra???
Yes...
>I'm not sure. Could this be the case and if so, what can I do to help myself?
I hope my suggestions are useful to you.
>Perhaps the following information bears no relevance but I want to share it
>nonetheless. During my last CranioSacral treatment my body contorted into
>some very strange positions eventually settling in a foetal position. I was
>crying like a baby and the emotion was deep sadness and hurt. I was made
>aware somehow that the sadness related to my resistance to come into this
>physical incarnation but that I had no choice.
I believe incarnation is always a choice. It may be that you had second
thoughts once you had a body to feel pain... I know I did! I was born a
week late and backwards because I tried to back out! :)
> I have had a number of
>astrological as well as psychic reading over the last few years that told me
>that this was a special incarnation for me in as much as I had some work to
>do that I should have done in my last incarnation but that I didnt complete.
Eh, "should" is always a dangerous word... it is full of guilt and
coercion. It does not respect Free Will.
Studies of near death experiences have some common threads. One is that
we experience a life review, with total empathy where we feel all the
feelings of everyone who we encountered, or whose lives we touched during
that incarnation. In this way, we decide for ourselves the answer to the
primary question: "How well did you love?" After assessing our results, we
may decide to return to have another shot at it, and try to do better in
the areas we feel we did not reach our goals. We set up the next
incarnation to create these opportunities, before birth.
I know, this is a little different than the idea that we *have* to
keep incarnating till we have resolved all our karma... but it feels more
resonant, to me. I do not think unconditional love would require us to be
punished, we do that to ourselves... ;) Goddess does not judge, we do. We
judge ourselves.
Time and space do not exist on the higher levels, so the linear concepts
of soul evolution through rebirth kind of break down if everything is
actually happening all at once...
>(Just as I typed that last sentence I got the ringing in my inner ear that I
>wrote in about recently. It died down after a few seconds.) Is it possible
>that I have incarnated to facilitate healing as a life task/purpose?
Remember that all healing is self healing... :) Certainly it is
possible you incarnated to have more experiences of sharing love in that
way... but as you may have already noticed, the love and healing you give,
comes back to you multiplied. You are healing yourself, through working
with the reflections of you, within others.
>Or could that be my ego making stories up?
All stories are ego stories, mine included. Goddess does not need a
reason why. Stuff just Is.
>Love, Charles
Love you, Charles!
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