To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/02/10 00:20
Subject: [k-list] Loving Goodbye: Off Topic
From: Acara
On 2003/02/10 00:20, Acara posted thus to the K-list:
Namaste, Dear K-List,
This is a hard list to leave in more than one
respect. I thought I'd unsubscribed from the List and
when I made it back to the mailbox, there are many
posts from the group, some saying sorry this door is
closing, others saying don't let it hit you in the ass
on the way out.
This is an incredible gathering. The decision to
leave the group is based on several things, mainly a
realization that the group is moving in a different
direction than what I wish to pursue.
We owe a great debt to the Orient for the preservation
of kundalini knowledge, but kundalini is represented
in all world mythology. I wish to pursue Energy
Transferal and the experiences involved, rather than
philosophical discussion of inscrutable oxymorons of
Eastern religion. The pursuit of "common threads" of
this experience is the domain or no discipline or
religion. That was the deciding factor in beginning
another list.
Hillary, you accused me of being High and Mighty, and
in the same breath told me the group had tried to
"help" me. Then, you input that I joined the group to
siphon off members. None of that is true:
There is a central paranoia here, which is critical of
many. I have not judged you or any on the list-- ever.
I posted to people who I felt were walking a path
similar to my own. If there was any infraction here
it was enthusiasm to share with those I felt were like
minded and equal distance on the path. Could it be
possible that you are the ones judging? Why do you
feel others are laughing at the members of this group
or judging you? When I posted I wished for you to say:
I haven't had that experience, but this happened to
me. I think you are intrepreting this in this way, I
see such and such...that is what exchange between
equals is, at least so is my experience.
Also, I was unaware I needed "help." I belong to 20
Lists and have enjoyed the company of thousands
involved in the spirit web community. Frankly, I was
blown away how I was recieved on the listl It was new
to me. Too, the same posts, which Mystress chortled
that "got no response" were sent to two other lists.
Those people never thought I was pretending to be
"high and mighty" or looking down on them. They are
still posting and exchanging ideas on those posts.
No, "sour grapes" was not involved, nor did I ever
judge myself above anyone on this list. If I ever
judged you, it was to believe you were very special.
As I said, I've been on the computer a short time and
I really have little time. Perhaps it was almost a
childish zealousness that brought you to the
conclusions you reached. I dash to the computer every
time I have a few minutes and frantically read the
posts. This was one of my favorite lists. When I'd
open some of the letters, I felt such a warm glow from
the energy of that person. I recognized fundamental
differences existed, but was so anxious to exchange
experiences. That was my intent! Period.
A deciding factor for me leaving was Pig Slayer's
posts. He swept onto the list with a breathtaking
post, (least it was to me) ignoring most the rules.
Out come the sticks: whackty...whackty whack. Another
newbie "judging the group" and breaking the rules. I
hope he returns. His energy was fresh and lively; he
had something he wished to share, not judge anyone.
I realize the rules are for a purpose and they are
good ones. If I might make this suggestion to the
Moderators: Why not prepare a stylized letter for
each infraction? Unless, you wish to close the list,
these things are going to occur, and it will be the
same infractions-- probably ad infinitum. This would
save time and when the reprimand came to the newbie,
it would be one of "controlled" fitzing over the
infraction. Instead of long, annoyed posts, send a
"polite" explanation why the list prefers and needs to
operate in this manner. Just thought I would throw
that out.
Hillory, as for the siphoning off members? What is up
with that? As I said, I belong to 20 lists, even
moderate one with over a hundred members. Several of
us belong to two or three lists. I joined this list to
participate. Are members beans to you? Do you think a
person can only belong to one list? Is there some sort
of jocking that goes on about lists to you? I am
beginning the other list to pursue ideas that diverge
from what this group enjoys discussing.
As Ken points out, there is no mass exodus happening;
there is no reason for you to imput this to me. This
List is solid and overall loving toward one another.
There is no battle: I'm leaving the field. I seem to
have gotten off on bad footing here. Rather than
pursue it and flaunt my own ego, I'd rather retire
from the fray. That is all.
Energy is mallable. I'm sorry to disappoint you, I'm
not an Alpha Wolf. I'm a Cat, totally, that is my
totem and heart. But when I found I was turning into a
mongoose, I decided it was time to leave the group.
This is a great List. I would not wish to harm it in
any way.
Mystress, I read your posts, and yes I hear you. You
are very knowledgeable and astute in many ways. I
appreciate your verve. The fundamental differences
will always exist between us. Our paths are headed in
different directions. You have a terribly venonmous
tongue. You really pissed me off several times, but
I'd end up chuckling at us both.
You are a big reason I'm leaving the list, but not for
reasons others might think. You made me define
purposes that I would have glossed by. In doing that
process, I realized it was not a pursuit of kundalini
and history I was looking to connect with, but those
walking the same direction I wish to go. I do believe
in concepts this group doesn't wish to examine. That
is well. It is not a matter of right or wrong
thinking, but different thinking. As Rumi says, there
is a field beyond right and wrong ....I'll meet you
there. You have my respect and deepest regard.
Sylvia, these eyes... The path I walk is the path I
see. As I move along it, I look around me. Once in a
while I come to a high spot and see over the valleys
and fields where others are walking their paths, some
are curving some move straight across the plane like a
surveyors sighting, but they are all moving in the
same direction. I honor all of you and the paths you
walk, even those I will never see. Blessings to all
of you and thank you for allowing me to walk this
distance with you. Peace to you all and loving
goodbyes to the List.
Om Shanti,
Acara
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