To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/02/09 04:55
Subject: Re: [k-list] what it feels like
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2003/02/09 04:55, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
Ya know, Shelle, ya got it all wrong. I can understand why you feel that way, and how you got that impression, but my internal process was quite different.
I'd been getting wary of the increasing noise to signal ratio on the list for quite awhile. Watching it creeping upwards as people gradually abandoned the "off topic" designation and the frivolity increased. Concerned, not sure what to do about it, and busy with dealing with the styled text and newbies not snipping stuff ... but when you, impeccable, supportive, always mindful Shelle joined in the off topic spam club, it felt like we were passing some point of no return. Hit the panic button, the ship is sinking!!
It is precisely because you have always been such an impeccable member, that your apparent sudden disregard of the guidelines got a larger reaction from me than the same behavior from a know-nothing newbie member would. You have always been a sterling example, and suddenly you were modeling exactly the behavior I had been wondering how to stop.
It is not that I wanted to make an example of you, but that you already were an example, of a model list member... who was suddenly modeling something else. Like seeing Queen Elizabeth posing in a Victoria's secret catalogue. See that on a billboard, you will probably come to a screeching halt and get rear-ended.
You responded that you thought it would be ok... it was like... if Shelle, who has always been so mindful of the guidelines thinks *this* is ok, what must the less attentive members be thinking? I had a nap, wondering... Then dogouman posted his gif, and several others responded reposting your poem, I had my answer. Eeeeeeek!!
If you are having a bad hair day and you need to vent, who do you go to? Not to someone who doesn't give a damn. You want to seek out someone who loves you enough to listen patiently to your spewing, and who will forgive you, and still love and respect you afterwards.
I did try to explain, that it was really not about you. Several times. I'm trying again, now.
We only hurt the ones we love, and we can only be hurt, by those whose opinion we care about. So it goes... human nature.
In a related way, and this is my perversity (everybody already knows I'm a pervert) I really only tease people if I like them (like a grade school romance) and I only give people a hard time, if I really respect them. Ya know? I don't pick on weaklings, and I don't expend time or energy on people I do not care about.
(Are you listening, Acara?)
I'd actually like to thank you. You action was perfect, in its own way because it provided me with an opportunity to address and resolve some issues that concerned me, but that I really had not known what to do about. Just like how RK forwarding my private styled text reminder to the list, finally got me some answers about digest attachments and styled text, when my previous requests for solutions and information had been ignored.
Did I address them in an ideal way? Well, that is subjective... you may feel I did not, but I am pleased with the overall result, and grateful to you. You are great!! :)
Blessings...
At 07:18 PM 08/02/03, Shellelr AT_NOSPAM aol.com wrote:
>Wow. As the Chief Horrid Little Creature/Offendee, I have to thank you, Felix, for apparently understanding what the past couple of days on the list have felt like to me.
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