To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/01/30 20:18
Subject: [k-list] Krusties Kaduceus Karavan
From: Lobster
On 2003/01/30 20:18, Lobster posted thus to the K-list:
Dear Friends of K Spirit :-)
to be healed:
Medicine Buddha
http://tooting.webspace.fish.co.uk/medicine/
to offer healing:
(Medicine Buddha dedication
http://www.instantmessageboards.com/forums/Lobster
- - - this will take you straight to the message board to
dedicate prayers, puja, dolphin energy from the above page etc)
to laugh:
==============
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would
be how???....)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's
"just" a suggestion).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but
wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery
after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the
rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with
head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this
because???....)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as
opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now,
somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news
flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child's
superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
=========
"Lord, keep me from drooling over Internet porn, spreading spam and wasting my day with online games." This heartfelt plea may soon get a heavenly hand: A group of Vatican elders is angling to give the Internet a patron saint - a holy helper with a dedicated connection to the Divine. The church's leading candidate is a seventh-century Spanish encyclopedist, Saint Isidore of Seville (560-636). A theologian and a scholar, Isidore was best known for his massive, 20-volume Etymologiae, AT_NOSPAM an attempt at compiling all the world's knowledge, covering grammar, medicine, law, geography, agriculture, theology, cooking and all points between. Another article from the Washington Post (may ask you to fill in a brief survey).
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