To: K-list
Recieved: 2003/01/22 15:41
Subject: [k-list] Thanks for all the help!!!
From: Charles Portugal
On 2003/01/22 15:41, Charles Portugal posted thus to the K-list:
Wow, what a response. All that 'help' pouring in! *ironic grin* .
After about 10 emails I was feeling more unsure and was kind of wishing I hadnt sent my original post. When I read peoples posts I open myself right up and absorb the energy and ideas as fully as possible and if the cap fits I wear it for a while to see how it feels. The process isnt a logical or cerebal one for me, I am sensitive and I trust my intuition to see me through times of doubt. So many points of view and opinions and I was left thinking, whose right and how can they think they "know"?
It was only after about 20 emails that my clarity returned, the fog lifted and I saw "MY" truth again. My conclusions follow below but if you have read enough of this thread and want to stop here I want to thank you very much for your heartfelt emails as they have given me much clarity.
Thai massage is the banner I practice under and I believe that some of the confusion I have experienced recently is due to the fact that I have only recently applied myself to my work on a full time basis and it is the only means I have to make a living. I am sensitive to and wary of my ego desires and didnt want there to be a conflict of interests brought about by my need to earn money. It is always very important that I get to the bottom of my intention and be sure where I am coming from because for me, intention is everything.
When I begin each session I connect to source and say a prayer. I declare that I am here to serve as a channel for divine love asking that whatever takes place is for the greater good of this person. I then surrender and and follow the flow, often in a trance like state but always with love in my heart.
I do not force energy with powerful channeling visualisations however there are times during the treatmnets that my hand s seem to move to a specific areas and heat is transmitted through them. I do not see white light but I do see waves of energy as everuything in my field of vision softens.. muich the same as the heat haze that hovers above a hot road.
People come to me through word of mouth or find me somehow. I am sure this is synchronicity at work as they often say that they felt a strong urge to see me but didnt know why. I learn something new everytime I work and I am humbled by the experience.
The common thread that runs through my work is that clients report a softening of the ego although they describe it using different words. They feel loved, they feel more open, they feel more connected and more free from some kind of restrictions that were there before. Their energy seems more balanced and they have a lightness about them.
I feel it is very much a part of my job to make sure that a client does not see me as their healer. Rather than looking to control or influence them, my aim is to empower them. Any changes or transformation takes place somehow by the grace of God.... and I am being used as a channel or tool for this process to occur. Why me? I honestly dont know, I can only hypothesise and understanding is the booby prize.
I believe that people who are on their own self discovery journey benefit from my work as it somehow removes physical and emotional blocks so that they might see their own truth clearer. Much the same as this email group does. In fact your answers had that very affect helped me see my truth clearer.... I consider this to be healing. Healing for me is facilitating the removal of emotional and physical barriers so that a persons light can shine more brightly.
I too know people that direct energy where it is not welcome or wanted, with no real clue as to the consequences. My friends mum is always saying "Charles I sent you some healing the other day cos I thought youmight be able to use it".... I had to tell her thanks but no thanks. One must look inside their heart for the truth because that is where it resides. Your emails and support simply helped claer the debris creatred by my own self doubt. One has to be honest with oneself and ask the question. Where am I coming from? What is my intention in doing this work?
On reading my original question did you respond or not respond because:
a) i had invited help therefore you felt it was fine to oblige.
b) you refrained because you didnt want to create a karmic debt.... and therefore left the baby drowning so to speak.
c) spoke up because your ego felt the need to be heard.
d) kept quiet because you feared being judged.
e) didnt entertain it because there is no answer.
f) etc, etc, etc..................
Only the individual really knows where they are coming from and can refelect on their motivation to help because every case is different.
In conclusion. I have come to realise that healing is a consensual act of loving kindness that comes from a place beyond the ego. Thank you for yours.
With loving gratitude
Charles
DISCLAIMER!
Home | Archive Index | Search the archives | Subscribe
K. List FAQ | Kundalini FAQs | Signs and Symptoms | Awakening Experiences | K. list Polls | Member Essays | Meditations | List Topics | Art Gallery | Cybrary | Sitemap | Email the moderators.
symbol.