To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/12/28 06:28
Subject: [K-list] Presentation
From: Karolina Lindqvist
On 2002/12/28 06:28, Karolina Lindqvist posted thus to the K-list:
I just want to write a few words, since I am new here, and sooner or later I
am going to write something on the subject.
This kundalini endevour is kind of new to me. It is not something I have
bothered with before. Then, just a few days ago, the Goddess told me "now it
is time to dive into kundalini", so therefore I am here. Well, that kind of
explains my world. It does not appear to fit other's description of reality.
One year ago, I had a brief meeting with my guru, and when I complained about
my trouble to get a job and get some money, and something else he said that I
should work with spiritual healing. I objected that I don't know anything
about it. He then just said that I will figure it out, like if that was
something easy you just do like that.
So I am on my way to "figure it out". Normally people just kind of get awakend
by someone, and the see the universe, and then they open up their own healing
center. That does not appear to happen to me. I don't know why not not.
I have known since a long time that I am kind of emphatic. Meaning that I pick
up the feelings of others (I can also send away). Quite stongly, since I very
easily get overwhelmed. Now the fairytale version is that you also should
have a grandmother that is a witch, that kind of helps you out and everything
becomes nice, cozy and fluffy. But my life is not a fairytale. It is more
like a book by Kafka.
On the positive side, I have a good spiritual education. Of the kind that has
been handed down from guru to disciple in India for many generations. Like to
compensate for the lack of witch grandmothers maybe. Anyway, a good education
is always useful. And with this kind of education, the already strange world
turns stranger. Even thought the education didn't directly deal with
kundalini, I call it mystic, since there is a kind of transfer of mystic
knowledge or realization. The mystery of the universe and reality is unfolded
for you. Life, death and everything in between stops to be mysteries.
Unfortunately that realization clashes with the realization that I have read
that some have from the Kundalini process. I am not sure what I can say about
that other than that I have to be careful what I write here.
Anyway, I now find myself a servant of the Goddess and her shakti. Maybe I got
it through a descending process, instead of a ascending. It was not that I
one day figure it out on my own, but instead the Goddess came to me and kind
of included me in her service. So therefore I now need to learn the practical
techniques, instead of using them for enlightment. Some of you might frown on
someone that comes through graze and not through techinque, what do I know?
And then I really don't feel enlightened. I am quite far from the saint type
and don't like when people expect saintly behaviour. But I feel the
connection with the Goddess, and even though I might not be a good servant in
general, being too individualistic, strong-willed and opiniated, service to
the Goddess comes from love.
I tend to write far too long texts, which no one can figure out what it is all
about, so I better stop here and now.
Karolina
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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