To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/12/06 15:36
Subject: [K-list] awakening or awakened?
From: Xsourceoflightx
On 2002/12/06 15:36, Xsourceoflightx posted thus to the K-list:
Hi All!
I'm new to this list. I'm currently going through a kundalini awakening that
I believe may have actually started a decade ago but I somehow slowed or
stopped the process. Over the past ten years I have gone through reoccurring
episodes which have been written off to various things... PTSD, Depression,
Anxiety Disorder, Mania, Manic depression.... What a strange trip it has
been! My symptoms, if that's a good word to use were:
1. hot flashes (for a decade I have had hot flashes that always felt like a
huge rush of energy but I just thought they were hot flashes and ignored
them)
2. vision like dreams about the oneness of consciousness
3. manic like episodes where I would not sleep for days, weeks, even months
4. depression, anxiety, powerful body tremors
5. periods of unexplainable fatigue....
These were my main symptoms which were always diagnosed as other things if I
pursued medical care for them. I managed to gain control over this
'awakening' back in '99 with meditation and regular weight training and a
very healthy diet as well as a stronger belief/faith in God. That helped
balance me and control the flow of energy. Then, back in May I started
getting strong intuitions that came in the form of a few words here and
there. I've been very intuitive for years now. At that time, (May) I also
began meditating more heavily and the symptoms reemerged, but this time it
was different. I was inclined to move in a very spiritual direction and let
my intuition guide me. It seems as though I have been putting a spiritual
puzzle together which has ultimately led me to Kundalini. After reading much
about it online, it's like it finally makes sense on a higher level.
Now that I understand that I am going through this awakening, I'm curious
about how we know when we are fully awakened. I am at the point where I can
focus my energy and be almost instantly in a state of joy. Recently I have
noticed that during meditation I feel almost like I am in a cage or like
there is a lot of pressure in my head and I have to stop the meditation. I
can raise my vibrations at will and feel my whole body tingle with a sense of
euphoria. My head will tingle the most and it's like I'm going into a
somewhat altered state of consciousness and things seem surreal. I can also
shift my energy on command to a very loving state where I suddenly feel very
connected to everyone around me and I have a profound sense of love and
compassion for all people and feel compelled to be the most loving and kind
being possible.
I guess my real questions are:
Does anyone know where I am in this process of awakening?
Can anyone point me in a direction where I can learn more about this?
And finally, this may sound far out to some, but the way I perceive things
based on my journey, this life, to me, is an illusion and I believe we are
all consciouness/energy and ultimately we are in complete charge of the
illusion... that nothing is beyond our grasp. (This is not to say I am
right. This just happens to be my truth. ) Does anyone share this
perception? I understand everyone has their own beliefs and understandings
and perceptions on life ... but I'd really appreciate input from anyone who
understands things to be this way.
blessings,
Adrienne
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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