To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/12/03 11:30
Subject: [K-list] Introduction
From: Sandy
On 2002/12/03 11:30, Sandy posted thus to the K-list:
Hello all,
My name is sandy, I am a practicing Buddhist for the
past six years and have been exploring my own power
for much longer. The past 3 years or so I've been
digging deeper and found K. I could not say that I
have had a definitive experience but I do experience
the flow of energy up through my body while meditating
as well as the power of being open to the universe and
how much is out there for us when we are open to it. I
can also say that it scares me sometimes and I think I
miss some things because I turn away mentally. (I'd
like to stop that)
I am a visual artist working in oils at this time. I
work and live in the Wash DC area. I am about to start
attending an organized yoga class and was very
interested in the recent discussion of yoga and K.
>which I seem to need to do every so often, whenever I
>stop >seeing perfection and get bent out of shape.
>Especially in >November... every November I get
pissed >with my work and >myself enough to want to
throw it
>all out, abandon all the things I usually love, and
>run off to Fiji to paint...
I also experienced the November "problem" this year
but it seemed like the first time its happened so
intensly. I am always thinking about running off to
paint :) But really I was ready to chuck it all, it
seems to have subsided right now. This has been going
on for the past 3 years (wanting to leave) I think it
has had to do with pre and post 9/11 feelings and
being in Wash DC, I can imagine better places to
be....
I also wanted to comment on Laura's problem with a
person who she has an intense connection to but can't
be "with". I experienced the same situation a few
years ago. I can relate to the MASSIVE frustration, in
my case I waited about a year and a half and then
accepted what was and that this was not the time. I
opened up to finding (and found) someone else to be
very happy with. I had to choose to look for my
physical connection elsewhere or go crazy....
Although our relationship is very strong in its
current form, I am sometimes pulled back to that
place, that has not totally subsided (for either of us
but it is manageable). I still think its cruel for the
"other" person to agree there is something special but
then NOT say "we are not going there" so you are
always thinking it might happen...I still think it
might happen someday.
There are reasons why I was tested this way, I needed
to desire something so badly and then realize I could
go on without it, I also think we are connected to
many people....and have to take different things from
each connection, sometimes not the things we want...I
am glad I still have my friend in my life, it reminds
me of my weakness and my strength, often.
I am thankful to have found this place and that you
are all so compassionate and helpful. I have much to
learn
thanks
sandy
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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