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To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/11/27 11:59
Subject: [K-list] loving the dying
From: lionessbleu1

On 2002/11/27 11:59, lionessbleu1 posted thus to the K-list:

Yesterday at work I received a direct admit from a doctor's office,
a breast cancer patient coming in for management of her chronic pain.

She is only 40, her youngest daughter is 4. On her chest you can see
where the cancer has eaten away through her chest wall. She has big
gaping cavities under her arms stuffed with bandages.

She was on 100 mg of Morphine twice a day and it wasn't holding her
so she was brought in to be started on a running IV of morphine. She
is spirialing downward.

As I work as an RN in a teaching hospital there was many interns and
residents in the room because she had come in to rule out cardiac
tamponade also. This is a clinical emergency because it means the
sac surrounding the heart was filling with fluid which would keep
the heart from beating. She was in great, great pain.

During the course of the evening she had to urinate but she was too
weak to walk to the bathroom. I found a bedside commode and began to
assist her. Her cheeks were wet with tears, shivering with pain
because the single 4 mg IV doses of Morphine I gave her did not last
very long. (We were waiting for the setup for the IV pump to come up
from pharmacy to give her continuous Morphine.)

She was apologetic for having to lean on me as I extended my arms to
her. I held her as I slipped her pants down so she could sit on the
commode. I instructed her to slow her breaths, make them deep. She
looked at me with such deep pain in her eyes, still apologetic
because she felt like a burden. I took her in my arms, stroked her
head and told her she could lean as much as she wanted because I
held her and I wouldn't let her go.

I felt my heart melt as the Shakti swirled around us and we held
each other for a short time, as intimate as lovers. We both exhaled
and inhaled our breaths together.

I love how Shakti enriches my every day experiences.

Do you?

Namaste,
Susan

http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm

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