To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/10/16 14:53
Subject: Re: [K-list] Scriptural support for total annihilation of the ego, as require...
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2002/10/16 14:53, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
At 10:46 AM 06/10/02, druoutATnospamaol.com wrote:
>You will find there are many wise people here, not the least, of course, is
>our List owner Mystress Angelique Serpent.
Wow, that is a lot to live up to... :) Thanks Hillary!
Re: the topic in the header... There has been some debate about
scriptural support for ego annihilation Vs. experiential support, list
member experiences.
Recently I received this post from someone... a follow-up to her
receiving Serpent Fire Tummo initiation from me. I asker her permission to
post it elsewhere, because it is remarkable and the energy she is radiating
is so very blissful. Following are parts of my response to her.>Date: Tue, 24 Sep 2002 15:05:51 -0500
>To: Mystress Angelique Serpent <serpentATnospamfire-serpent.com>
>Subject: experience
>Dear Angelique,
>
> May I share some of my experiences since the Tummo initiation?
>
>About a week or so after we did the Tummo initiation my husband and i
>got into a huge fight. Some place in the middle of that fight all of a
>sudden I -knew- that everything was a lie or not true. Everything.
>Everything I had ever seen, learned heard or encountered was not true.
>All of my beliefs were baloney. It really blew my mind. Threw me off
>balance. For a few weeks after I would see or hear or think of something
>and I would think and know -that's not true. I felt very unbalanced.
>What do I believe now? How do I live? Where do I go with this? If
>everything I have believed in isn't true what now?
>
>Now I am at a point where I see things happening in the world but for
>the most part there is no strong emotional connection to it. The war
>with Iraq- nothing. The US economy- nothing. Some of my friends are all
>gung ho about going to brazil and saving indigenous knowledge- me
>nothing. I believe that they can take care of themselves just fine. I
>feel as if I don't have any passion for anything any more. I can just
>plunk away in my garden and house and let the world pass me by.
>
>There are still a few things that can grab my attention but not very
>many any more. I feel like - hey what ever. My husbands job ends next
>Monday and I have a bit of worry but mostly it's hey what ever. So
>weird. Everyone is running around trying to save the world and I'm like
>what's the point. If ya wanna do that, go for it I guess. Whatever.
>
>Maybe I've moved past some of those things and I feel like now what.
>Maybe I've moved into a space of denying everything. Not sure. Who am I
>without a cause? Who am I at all? Guess I'll find out. it doesn't seem
>to be going away. Things I felt strongly about in the past have no
>meaning to me now. It's just feels strange because it's still so
>new... or something. I feel different, strange almost like I am
>disconnected from it all. It is a curious thing. If you have any
>insight I would be very grateful. Thank you for listening.Thank you for
>your time.
>
>Thank you for all that you do.
> With Love, Vickie
>.............................................................................................
I responded to congratulate and reassure her:
> Welcome to Buddha hood. That image of the fat laughing buddha with his
> hands in the air? He's shrugging, and saying "hey, what ever." Elsewhere
> I have defined it as "Shrug, laugh, don't care." Well, maybe you have not
> gotten to the laughing stage yet... but you are well on your way. Focus
> on the peace of it.
>
> All of our beliefs, our religions, our science and experiences, all 58
> lessons of FST and 20,000 K list posts cannot define the truth of the
> universe, and never will. Nothing is true in them, but the creative
> Shakti they carry. Consciousness itself. They become true, if you believe
> them... but the ultimate Truth is ... eternally incomprehensible. Cosmic
> joke. Welcome to the folly of my life. Of everybody's.
>
> It takes a bit of getting used to, just because it is so different...
> we are the TV generations, raised to believe that life is all drama and
> passion, with a cliffhanger every hour. Look at your friends, choosing to
> believe stuff so they can play hero... you know it is not true, but they
> are living in a self created universe... Everybody does, and most people
> as you may have noticed, never stop to question whether what they are
> doing is true or not. They believe it, so it is true for them... Goddess
> provides.
>
> Gardening is more real, than what most people chase after. Why are
> there so many Zen Gardens, but no Zen football fields?
>
> For me, it was people like you, who brought me back to motivation for
> "doing" in the world. I know it does not matter what I do, everybody is
> God pretending to be something else whether they know it or not... but
> God within these illusions of other called me to come back to work,
> teaching and reflecting. So, I surrendered to that. Even knowing that
> nothing I say, is true. Storytelling. But, the energy of love, passing to
> the illusion of other, it is worth doing...
>
> I am both passionate about it, in the doing, but also willing to set it
> all aside and walk away. See what else Goddess presents to me. If I get
> attached to it, then Goddess arranges me to get so pissed off that I want
> to dump it all down a hole... and come out detached again. Surrender to
> dealing with what is in front of me. The state of detachment, provides
> the power of Grace. Without resistance mucking up the works... what
> spirit wants, comes through.
>
> Relax into this state. You are still cleansing... that is why triggers
> are still coming up for you to shrug at, and release. When your body is
> clear, you will be getting more emotions back, but you will be navigating
> by your belly, not your mind. What makes a nice warmth in your 2-3-4
> chakras, is what you follow. That part of you still speaks, and there is
> not motive to not surrender to it. No resistance.
>
> Hang out in nonduality for a while. Get to know the place. Stay there
> till you see the cosmic joke and become laughing buddha... Then you will
> find entertaining folly, some motive to return to the game. Something to
> do that is in some way more enjoyable than sitting on your ass under the
> boddhi tree for the rest of your life... and you will be able to do it,
> very well because you know it doesn't matter. Product of Grace.
>
> Goddess has it handled... or, something seems to... :)
>
>>Who am I
>>without a cause? Who am I at all? Guess I'll find out.
>
> Well, good luck. I never did. We cannot know, all our ideas and
> beliefs about who we are, are part of the folly. You just are. I AM. It
> dies not matter what we do, so you might as well follow your bliss. Bliss
> is not passion, it has a larger dose of peace in it. Passion is drama,
> believing the illusion, giving energy to fear and running off to save the
> world.
>
>
> >it doesn't seem to be going away.
>
> Nope... good thing too. It will change, as you surrender to it. There
> will be more warm bliss places and fewer moments of wondering if your
> state of mind is unnatural. If you get uncomfortable enough to decide to
> attach to something, you may grow a new ego around it and have a bumpy
> slide, into a drama reality, but Goddess will always bungee cord you out
> eventually.
>
> >Things I felt strongly about in the past have no
> >meaning to me now. It's just feels strange because it's still so
> >new... or something. I feel different, strange almost like I am
> >disconnected from it all.
>
> Yes, detached. Yet... you may notice, everything you focus on,
> changes as you look at it. Have you observed how people are responding to
> you? They are probably enjoying the grace radiating off you.
> Unconditional love and acceptance.
..........................................................................................
................................................
Nothing matters, but once in a while... somebody really "graduates."
Finds their way out of the forest... sees beyond the trees. It gives me a
deep sense of fulfillment and joy that I cannot define. It is not quite
pride, or satisfaction, although it is similar... mixed with awe.
Wonder. There is a strong element of gratitude and humility in it, as I
cannot take credit for what Goddess does but I am so lucky, I get to
watch... :) It is like the peace and wonder from watching something being
born. A baby buddha coming into the world. Like when the art moving through
you turns out lovely, the Muse doing Her magic. Joy in service.
That's what it comes round to... service to other, sharing love.
..........................................
Tummo fire initiations are so curious... to each according to their
ability to receive. Tummo is the clear light, heat that burns away karma
blockages so the Shakti and life force can flow. Like Kundalini, it is
potential within everyone, but not everyone gets sparked. Sparking can be
spontaneous or Shaktipat. Initiation. I offered my students a special deal
on Serpent fire tummo initiation this summer and it was very enjoyable
seeing how it moved through them in different ways, their growing. Perhaps
some of them will be moved to share their experiences.
I am moved to offer a similar deal to K-list members... Serpent Fire
Tummo initiation for $100.usd...
With the Tummo fire, it is like blockages get burnt up where they are.
You still need to keep the crown chakra open to let the smoke out... but
it is smoke, not substance. There is less experience of feeling the
emotional content of the karma as the chunks of baggage pass up through the
throat and mind chakras on their way out the crown. Like having an
incinerator right in your kitchen, instead of having to smell the garbage
as you haul it out of the house to be taken away by a truck. Karma
incinerator inside, pleasant warm alchemy of transmutation. Makes for a
smoother process, especially since the initiation itself clears any major
blockages, and often raises K. to the crown. Depends on the recipient, on
what they are ready for. To each according to their ability.. yet, all in
one. The initiation is not done in degrees or levels like Reiki. It is an
all-in-one package that unfolds itself at a pace the recipient can handle.
Usually I suggest that recipients do not try to use it on anyone else for a
month or two, and wait a year before initiating anyone else. The nice thing
is, most who receive it are not looking to pass it on, they are focused
inward, on their own growth... and that is perfection.
Just talking about it, my hands and solar plexus heat up... ready to
share fire. Nice.
What is ego? In my perceptions, it is a clutter in the energy body.
Seeds and onion layers of old pain and fear, blocking energy and diverting
it to emotional drama and stress. Beliefs, attachments, that which is
unforgiven and what is desired too much. All adding up to a limited idea of
who you think you are... and what you think you are not.
What happens if it all burns away? All the illusions of belief, all the
attachments. What, or who is left? The who, is not definable... all
definitions are belief, illusion. The what... unconditional love. Service
to other.
One touchstone for my work, is a few lines from "Tommy". The last
lines of the rock opera, when Tommy attains self realization and is
overcome with the beauty of seeing the Divine in his followers, he sings to
them:
"Listening to you, I get the music
Gazing at you I get the heat
Following you I climb the mountain,
I get excitement at your feet.
Right behind you I see the millions,
On you, I see the glory,
From you I get opinions,
From you, I get the story. "
Monday was Canadian Thanks giving.. thanks to and for you all! :)
Blessings...
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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