To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/10/14 02:08
Subject: RE: [K-list] Kriyas and Spasms/good fortune poll
From: Lori Worley

Dear Hillary

My experience of the clean-up in the K process has not been on the physical
so much as the emotional and mental so far. This has been bloody hard for
the past 4.5 years, but it seems to be easing up a bit at the moment. The
reason is that in the last 6 months I've really acknowledged that I am going
through the process, and I have decided to embrace it and in many ways
surrender to it. Strangely (or not) this coincided with me stopping daily
meditation, and instead I focused on being in the world and being present in
other ways (lots and lots of grounding).

When I look back on it I was using meditation and guru worship as an attempt
to escape the challenges of this life. I was fearful of living. I realise
now that I didn't have a clear sense of my little self, and I was trying to
obliterate it before I even knew what 'I' was about.

So for me, it got easier when I stepped away from a practice, embraced the
process, and started living fully. Part of that process was to take the
risk of leaving the business world completely to fulfil a life-long dream of
being a healer. This is where my heart is, and I began to validate my true
'self'. The transition has not been easy, but it's helped me clear a lot of
the dross in my life, and I have so enjoyed it.

The other part has been about embracing my self fully, especially my shadow
and my feminine aspects, which I've been working on since May last year. At
the moment, I feel I'm being called to integrate the masculine/feminine,
yin/yang, active/receptive aspects of my self more fully, to be played out
at the moment by putting myself out into the world as a Bowen practitioner
and psychotherapist worth knowing and employing.

That's where I am at the moment. I suspect that fairly soon, once these
shoes have become slightly broken in and comfortable, I'll return to a
meditation practice. It's a long, protracted answer to your questions, but
I felt compelled to write. It's really good for me to express things, as it
helps me come to some level of clarity.

Cheers
Lori
xo
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