To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/08/17 22:22
Subject: [K-list] Re: Love Block (Forwarded from Sabrina)
From: mundaneyogi
On 2002/08/17 22:22, mundaneyogi posted thus to the K-list:
--- In Kundalini-GatewayATnospamy..., "mundaneyogi" <gutrekATnospamh...> wrote:
someone
> invariably does something to really piss me off and upset my
peace.
> I wind-up calling them "idiot" or some other curse under my breath.
Hee hee..I have the same problem which pretty much started when I
lived in Toronto. People were really rude and inconsiderate,
especially on the busses and subways. I mean, who doesn't give up
their seat for someome walking with a cane or someone who's
clutching their stomach in pain? Seeing young, healthy people
sitting and frail elderly folk standing MAJORLY pissed me off. The
only people who offered me their seat were generally sleazy young
guys trying to pick me up. The level of apathy and sheer dog-eat-
doggedness majorly closed down my heart chakra.
And now I work in a call centre and I have all these customers
calling and yelling at me because they can't get on the internet.
Who does that? Is not having email for a couple of days such a
catastrophe that you have to insult someone's intelligence? And
worse of all, sometimes I put customers on mute and they think
they're on hold, and I can hear them in the background calling me
incompetent or a B*tch just because I won't troubleshoot their 7
computer home network. My job is to troubleshoot internet
connectivity, not to fix their IM, or home network, or web
conferencing or whatever. At least there are nice customers who
say 'I know it's not you who I should be mad at, just the crappy
company you represent.' I feel like shouting AMEN TO THAT!!Course I
would be fired if I did.
So every day I go to work and ground like crazy and surrender all
these projectile barbs customers are throwing at me. I feel like I'm
surrounded by an army of archers lobbing poison arrows at
me....projections, projections. It got so bad one day I found myself
being really short and curt with this perfectly nice man who was
doing nothing wrong, but he was JUST THERE. I'm sure he felt my
hostility through the phone. I wanted to say 'I'm sorry, sir, but
the 40 other idiots I talked to today sapped all the human decency
out of me and I have no kindness left for you. You'll have to excuse
me.' Instead I just tried to send all the toxic energy inward and
upward, but I still feel really bad about that. I wonder if this job
is just a mirror game that I should stick out or if I should quit
and go to the unemployment line. Because we have a 15% unemployment
rate where I live and this is one of the best-paying jobs around. I
have asked the universe for something better and am sitting here
waiting patiently, but I kind of feel I can't handle all the karmic
poison being thrown at me in the meantime. Is there some reason for
this or am I punishing myself unnessesarily?
So I try my best to keep an open heart and help the customers, but
when I do I've got my supervisor chewing me out for high average
call times or 'going outside of my demarcation.'Apparently numbers
are better than compassion....so my hatred of the customers gets
transferred to management. Is it possible to have your energy bodies
fixed to auto-transmute projections of others and vice versa? It's
hard to consciously clear the negative energy when your blood
pressure is through the roof and you have to remember about a
hundred different details.
Anyway, I apologize about the rant. Is one supposed to keep an open
heart in such environments or just get the hell out of the
environment? Sure worked when I left Toronto.
Sabrina
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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