To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/08/15 10:58
Subject: Re: [K-list] Am i in the Dark Night?
From: Druout
On 2002/08/15 10:58, Druout posted thus to the K-list:
Dear Ben,
You have been given a taste of something most people never experience during
a lifetime! :)) Wonderful! Desiring it to continue/return is tantamount
to rejecting it, because by doing so you are saying you know better what is
best for you! :)) Try giving gratitude for that which you have already been
given. You might find that you start seeing god/energy in everything around
you, not just in the sensation of bliss.
The outward effects of the energy also seem to be cyclical, but remember that
the energy is always there. The feeling that you have lost God, is simply a
mental construct. You are always part of it and it of you.
Love, Hillary
In a message dated 8/14/2002 4:00:43 PM Pacific Daylight Time,
thewindsofwarATnospamhotmail.com writes:> Apart from my other problems i have had a peculiar one as of late. It all
> started about 3 or 4 months ago when all of a sudden i felt a sweet and
> soft
> bliss that entered my heart that started when i just thought of God. IT was
>
> the best experience of my life, for two days i felt it nonstop. It got
> mildly intense, at its peak times i would walk around like a drunken man
> stumbling around and such. It was great! I prayed very much for it not to
> stop. But it did stop. When it stopped all i could think about was how
> could
> i get this joy back again it changed my whole life. After it happened
> though
> things were different. Music which i loved lost its luster, it no longer
> brought me joy to listen to, and the same with meditation, whenever i
> meditate NOTHING happens its very annoying. Ever since that happened i have
>
> not felt joy in anything at all its like im stuck in some weird void that
> is
> suffocating. My heart feels dry, and it feels like there is a vast
> emptiness
> within it. Iam sick of the physical world, i no longer look for hapiness
> from it, i have no desire at all but to have that joy again that i
> experienced. Thus i have a stronger desire for God than ever, yet i feel
> like im not progressing at all. It feels like iam an outcast, not in the
> physical world of men and not spiritual either. At times i moan and cry out
>
> from this suffering of emptiness that i feel. A friend said that I'm going
> through the dark night of the soul, and that my suffering would end in
> time.
> At first i thought it was true and great hope and hapiness came to me. Now
> weeks later its still here and I'm not sure. Maybe iam stuck in some weird
> void of suffering and it will never end? I don't really know what to think.
> -Ben
>
>
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