To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/08/14 07:24
Subject: [K-list] ~feeling the light~
From: ami301971
On 2002/08/14 07:24, ami301971 posted thus to the K-list:
Hi all :) I am so grateful for all of the responds on the list and
and off. I started to cry, which I have not really done since before
this all happened. someone said in a post or email I believe it was
Grant if not then please forgive me...The art of life is
happiness..or something like that. That touched me deeply. I think
alot of the reasons for my difficulties dealing with this...is there
is no answers. something I have a hard time dealing with. I always
desire the why.. and just when I had started to let go of knowing the
why for being alive and the how etc..this happends and yet again I am
faced with the letting go of the why and how. another wonderful
message to me pointed out that i might be feeling guilt because I
didnt not desire another child. She was absolutely right. I do feel
guilt, I have always believed we create our own reality. So, in this
my thought , i should say orginally, was that I created this
miscarriage.But, after Mystress' post, where basically the idea is
that some souls do not desire a totaly birthing experience, but just
to be in the physical long enough to work somethings out, I think I
can understand that the feeling (intuitivly) is that this miscarriage
was something this soul and my soul( which are one the same
ultimately) decided to have this expereince before creation. Sorry
about the run on sentence there, and my spelling is horrible, doesnt
help that I am a bit emotional right now so please forgive me.
Another wonderful message said , sometimes when we grieve for a loss
it becomes grief for all the losses one has ever had. I can relate to
that completely. I had a couple of terrible experiences as a child,
and I find I am grieving for those. I am not only grieving for my
miscarriage(the hope that new life brings), but also the loss of my
own childhood. I am so grateful for all the wonderful messages I have
recieved. I can feel the wonderful healing energy. Today, I can see
the sunshine, and the smile I have on my face is real. I feel
hopeful, and I am yes grateful this experience, it has allowed me the
opportunity to examine life and its wonder. It has also allowed me
the opportunity to see the vast goodness in humanity. You all have
allowed me to feel really hopeful for this first time in a long time.
I humbly say Thank You. Perhaps one day, someday, I will be able to
truly let each one of you know, how you all have helped me on the
road to true healing. Again thank you.
be blessed in the light of the wonder of creation
ami
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm
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