To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/07/02 20:44
Subject: Re: [K-list] Hello all... kinda out of it
From: Grant -

Hi Keith,
Every sin wave is equally opposed by it's cosine.
I was reading a strange essay from those urls I posted a while back to the
list. It stated in words more poetic then I am capable of; that when you
trod in darkness, it is only to re-emerge in a brighter light. The feeling
of 'deadness' that all must experience where nothing is purposeful. It's
surviving the deadness that will eventually show you that the light grows
because of the darkness and not in spite of it.

If you want to sleep then sleep. Maybe when you are done sleeping you'll
wake up. :)

-Grant----Original Message Follows----
From: Keith Chapman <woopachingATnospamyahoo.com>
To: K-list
Subject: [K-list] Hello all... kinda out of it
Date: Tue, 2 Jul 2002 19:54:37 -0700 (PDT)

Hello everyone,
    Hope you all are doing great in your endevors and dreams. I think I
might take a moment to ramble on... I've just been in a weird limbo state
of mind lately. Unable to focus or calm, and so unmotivated. Meditation is
more like sleep and I no longer feel the old urges to dive into deep
contemplation of some intriguing thought. When I first started meditating,
it was all I wanted to do. Just meditate all day long, now I can hardly
sit for 5 minutes without feeling that it would be nicer just to fall
asleep. I guess I've just lost my motivation, but why? I still feel a want
to be into spirituality, I would love to be so connected to everything, or
really to be consciously connected to everything. When I first joined the
list I read nearly every message, now I read only a few, and it all seems
like it has been all said before just through different words. So now that
I'm thinking, perhaps I've withdrawn myself back towards grasping the
"real" world.. and holding onto my life out of fear. I believe I have lost
what tiny amount of surrender and contentment I may have at one point had
or lived as, I don't know how to explain it. Life seemed full and
blooming, vibrant and new. I know there's no reason why it should not be
full and invigorating now. Hmm, well thanks for listening, I know all I
really need to do is blah blah blah, get it out of me, and be happy again.

Thanks,
    Keith

http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
http://www.domin8rex.com/serpent/spirit/kindex.htm

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