To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/02/18 14:43
Subject: Re: [K-list] love and emotions.....
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2002/02/18 14:43, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
At 01:22 PM 17/02/02, Mia wrote:
>.....seems to be my day for asking questions today.....
>sorry about that.....
>did somebody manage to explain to a " normal" person the difference between
>" love" and love......<g>
>i mean.......
>people feel love from me, through me........
>and then they expect me to be in love with them and i'm not..........
>i mean......i'm not in this emotional kind of roundabout with them..........
>but to them, love and emotion is the same......
>they don't know love without emotions........
Right... and unconditional love... real unconditional love from a state
of nonduality, feels like nothing when you are feeling it.
Un conditional. No conditions. No emotions, no need for connection or
relationship, no need for the love to be requieted or appreciated. Just
peace that passeth understanding.
>....
>i do remember this time when i identified love with emotion and the more
>emotion - i thought- the more love
>by now it' s two totally different things for me.
>
>And sure, there is emotional love, but that's not the love i feel for those
>people......
> in a way......i don't " feel" at all........ i'm only shining.......
Yes! Emotional love happens in duality, and it is generally a
combination of two emotions... love plus need, love plus jealously, love
plus possessiveness, love plus need for approval or validation.
>and then they are getting confused. They feel " love" from me, but i'm not
>attached to them....not waiting for them to call or to write......
>i'm not missing them...... there is no longing and no desire and no wishes
>or imagination attached for me......
>and i cannot explain this fact to them. To them it looks like i'm "
>cold"....but at the same time they feel love coming from me to them.....
When your unconditional love impacts on their duality, they feel it as
an emotion... and for many it is not a nice emotion, it stirs up their
karmic issues, and they spew 'em at cha... and some of them will keep
hitting till they finally get the reaction they seek.
>quite often they start attacking, because they want to me react " human" and
>" human" means" emotion" to them.........
OH, GAWD!!! No shit! Oh, the stories I could tell... like how the
woman I threw out of my life 4 years ago because her provocation drove me
to the point of homicidal visions of throwing her down the stairs, wrote a
play last fall about it called "Driving Mistress Crazy"... a comedy, no
less!! Then phoned me last week to tell me in a strident voice about how
she has CHANGED, and she has PEACE in her heart and I am the one with the
problem. My problem is that my body gets post traumatic stress symptoms
around her... sigh. I will know she really has changed, when she stops
disrespecting my clearly and oft repeated request for her to leave me alone...
Or about the FST student last month, who was horribly jealous of my
vibe after feeling it in a private session, and so decided to take a short
cut and bomb me with so much of her stuff via private mail, it sent me
spiraling into psychosis for weeks and I had to hire another healer to put
me back together again.
The silver lining is that this healer put me back together better than
I was before, and I am learning amazing things from her that are
transforming my own work.
>i'm sure some of you know this scenario....... how do you handle it? Are you
>trying to explain? Or did you give up explaining?
Mostly I give up, or I tell them what unconditional love really is.
>Are you staying in the company of those who are in the same boat and no
>explanation is needed?
Yup.
>Are you able to be " close" to " normal" people nevertheless?
Um... anybody who hangs around me for any length of time will probably
become awakened... I am very contagious with Shakti. People who do not seek
awakening generally avoid me by instinct.
>the communication becomes so difficult ......
>i often feel, i can much easier communicate with a dolphin or a tree, with
>the wind or the universe than i can with " normal" people.......
Yeah... no ego to cause confusion...
>love to all
>mia
Blessings...
--
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