To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/01/21 19:15
Subject: [K-list] Re: suicide stuff
From: lionessbleu1
On 2002/01/21 19:15, lionessbleu1 posted thus to the K-list:
We can never run or flee from our problems. We might relieve the stress of them for a little while, make it a little manageable, but we can never run and hide from the problems we have in the world. They will come back and often larger in scope because they are warning signs of an internal breakdown and disorder.
Why is that? We are the creators of our problems. Wherever I run and go I take my own unique problems with me. There is no grass is greener on the other side of the fence. We are such powerful creators we will create those problems all over again to manifest wherever we go in life. Your life is a reflection of your internal belief systems. Your belief systems create the world you live in. (oh my, holy Matrix, Batman).
This is where the paradox of suicide comes in. We kill ourselves to escape our problems. There is something not logical about that. The creator kills himself to escape his creation. A god with a healthy self image at least will kill or destroy his creation and then start anew, with a clean canvas or new materials. If it doesn't work again, destroy it and start over again. A true god would never think of killing himself because his creation was crappy. :) How ungodlike for a god knows the difference between himself and his creation. He is not his creation although his creation is of him.
Unfortunately, humans are masters at creating in their lives what they don't want rather than what they do want. The bright side in this is they can relearn and retrain themselves to create what they want. The sad thing is most people have not a clue what they really want in their life or what that looks like so their lives reflect this mismash of unfocused concentration, weak, watery, no joy or passion.
The world of work is evil and has no meaning at all because you believe it to be so. My perception of the world is I am at play in it's fields. You and I can have the same job, same life circumstances and I respond differently because I perceive life differently.
One of the biggest secrets of life is one I say over and over again and no one hears it but yet it is key to understanding ourselves and our world.
That big secret is: Life is meaningless. Yep, it is true. You heard it here first. You don't have to figure that out for yourself. But this is a wonderful piece of info but people never take the next big leap and see...Yes, life is meaningless...AND...Life has only the meaning I give to it.
My question to you would be what is it about you that is meaningless? What is your own value in your eyes? Do you not see this beautiful, wonderful, lovely God being looking into your eyes when you look into your mirror in the morning? That is what I see when I look at you. I know that is who I am. I know who you are, do you? If you don't see this wonderful image of perfection when you look into your own eyes then it is time to discover where the gap between illusion and reality begins and close it.
I mentioned in another post about healing we must learn to love God/dess Self with our own hearts, minds, body and soul. Then it follows to love our neighbors as ourselves. We can't love our neighbors with any degree of respect or tender regard than we give ourselves regardless how we think we are loving them. It truly is only counterfeit love...not authentic or genuine.
Krishnamurti: "The moment you have in your heart this
extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the
ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed."
So here is another example of tough love...more like a swift kick in the ass.
Love yourself truely, gently, deeply and with passion. Honor yourself.
Be gentle with yourself. Treat yourself with the respect for the god you truly are.
Once you are awakened by kundalini your problems don't go away. Oh no..they magnify and intensify exponentially until you start screaming, "I surrender! I surrender all!" Don't expect Kundalini to melt away your problems...it just makes the mirror which you look into your soul much more focused, intensified by the Divine...it points out that which does not resonate with the Divine and brings pressure upon you to clean that out. Once you are starting to get clean on the inside...then the outside, your life, will reflect the newness of your heart and spirit.
You probably won't even hear half of what I write here. We can only retain what we are ready to receive. I can only hope you prove me wrong.
If you copy this post I just wrote and diligently begin to reflect on what I have written, just these concepts will transform your life and save you a lot of time and money spent in therapy and mood changing alternatives.
It is a beginning for you, not the ending.
Susan
--- In Kundalini-GatewayATnospamy..., "marraskuu1978" <marraskuu1978ATnospamy...> wrote:
> Joyful Fairy,
>
> I totally agree. In fact I made that promise to myself last year.
>
> If ever I become suicidal to the point where I have to dump life
> completely, I will do it by deleting my environment, not myself.
> Flee the country... run away from work, from debts, from stress. Just
> buy a one-way ticket to somewhere nice like Europe and start a new
> life, a new adventure.
>
> I often dream of such an escape. The world of work is very evil and
> often I feel there is no meaning in it all. I've been reading a lot
> of the essays on www.primitivism.com
> We live in a society where we grow food in order to lock it up and
> make you work 40 hours a week to earn money to buy it back. I need
> money to survive, yet my soul does not feel fulfilled from the work I
> do. My most productive hours of the day, 5 days a week, are given
> away. Perhaps I just haven't found what I want to do in life yet.
>
> Incidentally, I have never tried yoga yet... but because of my
> anxieties and low level of physical activity in life, I am convinced
> kundalini will do me good. I will start yoga this week.
>
> life is depressing me. I have so many hobbies and talents and loves,
> yet none of them convert into real paying jobs. Am I doomed to live
> the condition of adulthood this way?
>
> I can escape through art... but only temporarily.
>
> Sunday night, I stay up until 5am... troubled by the fear of going to
> work again on monday...
>
> I need a vacation.... i need freedom from work. yet i need money to
> pay back my student loans and my rent, etc. help!
>
>
>
>
> --- In Kundalini-GatewayATnospamy..., joyful <joyful_fairyATnospamy...> wrote:
> > PPS: And why not just quit your job, break your lease,
> > sell everything you own and move to Hawaii first? If
> > you're gonna do it, die someplace wonderful. Not to be
> > flippant, but you can ALWAYS walk away from life's
> > problems {except for physical illness}. Pack what you
> > own into a car and MOVE.
> > You are at choice.
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