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To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/01/05 17:07
Subject: Re: [K-list] the kundalini process and the spaces between
From: L. J. Klinsky


On 2002/01/05 17:07, L. J. Klinsky posted thus to the K-list:

I guess I'll leave future responses for the others in the group who are far more knowledgeable than I. All I can really say is my truth, that I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and all symptoms went away after K awakening. Exercise helped, but working through blocks helped me more. We're all different with different experiences; that's what makes communication so cool--the differences.

I can relate to analyzing stuff to death and explaining stuff away. I'm a master champion at it myself. Sometimes it just leads to a big circle of confusion. I opt for peace instead; it feels prettier. I wish you only the best.

Love,

Leslee
  ----- Original Message -----
  From: Magdalene Meretrix
  To: K-Group
  Sent: Saturday, January 05, 2002 1:08 PM
  Subject: Re: [K-list] the kundalini process and the spaces between

  At 09:31 AM 1/5/02 -0800, L. J. Klinsky wrote:

  >I've read a lot of postings from people whose K symptoms stopped
  >for long periods of time, or changed after time. This is not rare at all.

  I would ask what causes this, but I suspect no one knows.

  Part of what is confusing to me is that when I read other people's
  accounts, they describe surging energies along with all these physical
  symptoms but I'm just getting hte physical stuff. I can still move the
  kundalini around and work with it just as if it were regular prana, I can
  still send it shooting up and down my spine at will -- none of that has
  changed over the last decade. But I'm not having these symptoms of waking
  up at night with energy rushing through me or the kundalini running wild
  throughout my body all by itself. That's part of why I wonder if the
  physical symptoms and the kundalini are connected. Other than that first
  fire hydrant burst, I still have not ever experienced the energy taking
  over my body -- only the pain and physical symptoms.

  >I won't even go to a regular doctor anymore for anything related to this.

  I quit going to the doctors for hte joint and muscle pains because htey
  didn't have any satisfactory answers for me. The only thing they had to
  suggest other than "take some hot baths and take it easy" were
  antidepressants and I've already been on antidepressants in my adolescence
  and early adulthood and already know that they're not drugs that are really
  beneficial for me in any positive way so I said, "thanks but no thanks" and
  decided that doctors weren't going to bea ny good for the aches and pains.

  >K works us through karmic blocks--that's its job--and this work often
  >manifests as horrible pains and other physical symptoms in our bodies.
  >The K is trying to run a smooth line through our body, but we have all
  >this gunk in us from memories, past hurts, and traumas. (The birth of
  >your child certainly qualifies as a trauma.)

  Actually, interestingly enough, the reason I bring her up is that if I
  choose to look at the last ten years of my life as "kundalini oriented,"
  she would be part of the process rather than a trauma to work out. One of
  the visions I had was that she came through me like a wave of fire to
  cleanse my body and soul. In another vision, she told me that she could not
  survive when she touched the air of this realm because she was an angelic
  spirit of fire and could not live on this plane. If all this is a symphony
  of kundalini process, she was a very significant chord.

  >I've learned to release my K energy through creative outlets, as well.
  This brings
  >up issues that I need to look at, work through, and surrender. I draw,
  paint, box,
  >drum, write, and whatever else will get my fears and other gunk out in the
  open to
  >be released. It doesn't seem like you're releasing yours, so much as
  redirecting it
  >through your body. K energy needs to be released.

  Jeepers, I'd have to reach through my breastbone and pull my heart out to
  the sun to do anything more releasing. I write, compose, play "spur of the
  moment" improvisation music, chant, drum, briskly walk, paint, color with
  crayons, string beads, talk to stuffed animals -- all that "play therapy"
  stuff -- and have been doing this instinctively and spontaneously my entire
  life, include during the period I was ill (with the exception of the brisk
  walking. I started the walking last March and the first time I went out, I
  couldn't make it around the block once without stopping three times to
  rest.) I have been crediting the walking with my remission. I am now
  walking three or four miles at a time at a pace of about four miles per
  hour. It has strengthened my back, strengthened my lungs, dropped weight
  off me.

  During the iciest months, I couldn't get out to walk and I found myself
  slipping into depression and rediscovering the intense pain. Once the ice
  retreated enough and I went out for a few miles, I was filled with delight
  and health again. For me, regular walking is the only thing that holds it
  all together and I'd pretty much figured that whatever it was that was
  going on would be okay so long as I just kept moving.

  >Many of us are VERY sensitive like this. My hearing is a lot like yours.
  >I can hear a bee fart! lol My eyes are very sensitive, too. I wear
  >sunglasses to go outside and can barely stand flourescent lights at all.

  Again, I was wearing sunglasses everywhere -- indoors, outdoors. I started
  forcing myself to walk and after a while I set my sunglasses aside and
  forgot where I put them.

  How could the three years of suffering have been kundalini crisis if I
  didn't feel overwhelming surges of energy and the whole thing was dissolved
  by developing a walking regimen?

  >I learned that when we stop focusing on what's wrong with us,
  >and instead focus on our blessings, this stuff disappears.
  >What we give our attention to gets stronger; when we focus
  >on sickness, we stay sick and get sicker. I've learned this the hard way.

  In my case, it was a combination of "giving up" and deciding that it didn't
  matter what I had, that no label or disease name was going to change
  anything and focusing more on the walking than on the symptoms.

  >Well, you're not alone and I do believe there is a way out for you.

  Maybe I wasn't clear enough about the fact that I'm in remission right now.
  There's the occasional morning stiffness that goes away after fifteen or
  twenty minutes to remind me that I need to keep walking if I want to stay
  healthy, but otherwise, I'm the picture of health. *At the moment* I don't
  need a way out. My concern is that if this were a kundalini crisis it might
  come back and it might come back worse and it might come back in such a way
  that I can't walk my way to health a second time. If there's any "way out"
  that I need, it's the way to not go through something like the last three
  years again. But I won't even know if I need that or not unless the
  symptoms (or others) come back.

  >Pain is a last resort for a body. Yours has been trying to tell
  >you something. Have you ever asked your pain what it's trying to
  >teach you? Every pain has a lesson.

  No, I never got introspective or meditative or developed dialogue with the
  pain itself. I guess it wanted me to get more exercise! LOL Again, from
  what I've been reading, how could it have been kundalini crisis if I was
  able to just "walk it away" like that without discovering some great inner
  truth or coming to some great spiritual insight. It feels like the gym
  coach: "walk it off." I haven't read anyone's story yet where things just
  disappeared so simply and mundanely as that.

  >All illness is a manifestation of our thoughts. Once we address
  >those thoughts, the illness goes away. Sounds easy, but takes TONS of work.

  If I addressed whatever those thoughts were, I'm honestly not aware of it.
  I've got more stuff free-floating and unfinished in my life than addressed
  so I should be writhing with pain, not feeling great.

  >It would do a lot of good to know you're experiencing K. K is the
  >ultimate reward for spiritual practice, a blessing to enlightenment.
  >Not many people in the scheme of things ever get to experience it,
  >yet you are. What a gift! It would certainly alleviate your physical
  >suffering if it could relieve mine.

  But it went away before the thought that it might have been a kundalini
  crisis ever crossed my mind......

  >Knowing the steps to work through it definitely makes
  >it go by a whole lot more comfortably. And, yes, it'll
  >make a huge difference in your life if you decide that
  >your symptoms are the result of a kundalini awakening.

  Even if the symptoms never return?

  >After reading about 20 books on fibromyalgia, I have
  >learned that it is a dis-ease that is prescribed when
  >a doctor doesn't have a clue as to what's going on with a person.

  What about the physical markers, then? What are they? People with
  fibromyalgia have sensitive trigger points. How does that translate into a
  kundalini paradigm? Peple with fibromyalgia have a detectable increase of
  Substance P in their spinal fluid -- as much as three times the amount in a
  healthy person. How does that translate into a kundalini paradigm?

  So long as there are observable markers in a person with fibromyalgia that
  aren't present in a person without fibromyalgia, it's difficult for me to
  believe that it's not a "real" condition.

  I've read that 2-5% of the population has fibromyalgia; does that mean that
  2-5% (or more) of the population is going through a kundalini awakening?
  That's millions of people....why do so few of them even think of kundalini
  as a possibility? Why aren't many many more alternative and complementary
  health practitioners speaking about kundalini?

  >I hope anything I said will shed some light on this for you.

  It raised even more questions, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

  Agape,
  M


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