To: K-list
Recieved: 2002/01/05 14:08
Subject: Re: [K-list] the kundalini process and the spaces between
From: Magdalene Meretrix
On 2002/01/05 14:08, Magdalene Meretrix posted thus to the K-list:
At 09:31 AM 1/5/02 -0800, L. J. Klinsky wrote:
>I've read a lot of postings from people whose K symptoms stopped
>for long periods of time, or changed after time. This is not rare at all.
I would ask what causes this, but I suspect no one knows.
Part of what is confusing to me is that when I read other people's
accounts, they describe surging energies along with all these physical
symptoms but I'm just getting hte physical stuff. I can still move the
kundalini around and work with it just as if it were regular prana, I can
still send it shooting up and down my spine at will -- none of that has
changed over the last decade. But I'm not having these symptoms of waking
up at night with energy rushing through me or the kundalini running wild
throughout my body all by itself. That's part of why I wonder if the
physical symptoms and the kundalini are connected. Other than that first
fire hydrant burst, I still have not ever experienced the energy taking
over my body -- only the pain and physical symptoms.
>I won't even go to a regular doctor anymore for anything related to this.
I quit going to the doctors for hte joint and muscle pains because htey
didn't have any satisfactory answers for me. The only thing they had to
suggest other than "take some hot baths and take it easy" were
antidepressants and I've already been on antidepressants in my adolescence
and early adulthood and already know that they're not drugs that are really
beneficial for me in any positive way so I said, "thanks but no thanks" and
decided that doctors weren't going to bea ny good for the aches and pains.
>K works us through karmic blocks--that's its job--and this work often
>manifests as horrible pains and other physical symptoms in our bodies.
>The K is trying to run a smooth line through our body, but we have all
>this gunk in us from memories, past hurts, and traumas. (The birth of
>your child certainly qualifies as a trauma.)
Actually, interestingly enough, the reason I bring her up is that if I
choose to look at the last ten years of my life as "kundalini oriented,"
she would be part of the process rather than a trauma to work out. One of
the visions I had was that she came through me like a wave of fire to
cleanse my body and soul. In another vision, she told me that she could not
survive when she touched the air of this realm because she was an angelic
spirit of fire and could not live on this plane. If all this is a symphony
of kundalini process, she was a very significant chord.
>I've learned to release my K energy through creative outlets, as well.
This brings
>up issues that I need to look at, work through, and surrender. I draw,
paint, box,
>drum, write, and whatever else will get my fears and other gunk out in the
open to
>be released. It doesn't seem like you're releasing yours, so much as
redirecting it
>through your body. K energy needs to be released.
Jeepers, I'd have to reach through my breastbone and pull my heart out to
the sun to do anything more releasing. I write, compose, play "spur of the
moment" improvisation music, chant, drum, briskly walk, paint, color with
crayons, string beads, talk to stuffed animals -- all that "play therapy"
stuff -- and have been doing this instinctively and spontaneously my entire
life, include during the period I was ill (with the exception of the brisk
walking. I started the walking last March and the first time I went out, I
couldn't make it around the block once without stopping three times to
rest.) I have been crediting the walking with my remission. I am now
walking three or four miles at a time at a pace of about four miles per
hour. It has strengthened my back, strengthened my lungs, dropped weight
off me.
During the iciest months, I couldn't get out to walk and I found myself
slipping into depression and rediscovering the intense pain. Once the ice
retreated enough and I went out for a few miles, I was filled with delight
and health again. For me, regular walking is the only thing that holds it
all together and I'd pretty much figured that whatever it was that was
going on would be okay so long as I just kept moving.
>Many of us are VERY sensitive like this. My hearing is a lot like yours.
>I can hear a bee fart! lol My eyes are very sensitive, too. I wear
>sunglasses to go outside and can barely stand flourescent lights at all.
Again, I was wearing sunglasses everywhere -- indoors, outdoors. I started
forcing myself to walk and after a while I set my sunglasses aside and
forgot where I put them.
How could the three years of suffering have been kundalini crisis if I
didn't feel overwhelming surges of energy and the whole thing was dissolved
by developing a walking regimen?
>I learned that when we stop focusing on what's wrong with us,
>and instead focus on our blessings, this stuff disappears.
>What we give our attention to gets stronger; when we focus
>on sickness, we stay sick and get sicker. I've learned this the hard way.
In my case, it was a combination of "giving up" and deciding that it didn't
matter what I had, that no label or disease name was going to change
anything and focusing more on the walking than on the symptoms.
>Well, you're not alone and I do believe there is a way out for you.
Maybe I wasn't clear enough about the fact that I'm in remission right now.
There's the occasional morning stiffness that goes away after fifteen or
twenty minutes to remind me that I need to keep walking if I want to stay
healthy, but otherwise, I'm the picture of health. *At the moment* I don't
need a way out. My concern is that if this were a kundalini crisis it might
come back and it might come back worse and it might come back in such a way
that I can't walk my way to health a second time. If there's any "way out"
that I need, it's the way to not go through something like the last three
years again. But I won't even know if I need that or not unless the
symptoms (or others) come back.
>Pain is a last resort for a body. Yours has been trying to tell
>you something. Have you ever asked your pain what it's trying to
>teach you? Every pain has a lesson.
No, I never got introspective or meditative or developed dialogue with the
pain itself. I guess it wanted me to get more exercise! LOL Again, from
what I've been reading, how could it have been kundalini crisis if I was
able to just "walk it away" like that without discovering some great inner
truth or coming to some great spiritual insight. It feels like the gym
coach: "walk it off." I haven't read anyone's story yet where things just
disappeared so simply and mundanely as that.
>All illness is a manifestation of our thoughts. Once we address
>those thoughts, the illness goes away. Sounds easy, but takes TONS of work.
If I addressed whatever those thoughts were, I'm honestly not aware of it.
I've got more stuff free-floating and unfinished in my life than addressed
so I should be writhing with pain, not feeling great.
>It would do a lot of good to know you're experiencing K. K is the
>ultimate reward for spiritual practice, a blessing to enlightenment.
>Not many people in the scheme of things ever get to experience it,
>yet you are. What a gift! It would certainly alleviate your physical
>suffering if it could relieve mine.
But it went away before the thought that it might have been a kundalini
crisis ever crossed my mind......
>Knowing the steps to work through it definitely makes
>it go by a whole lot more comfortably. And, yes, it'll
>make a huge difference in your life if you decide that
>your symptoms are the result of a kundalini awakening.
Even if the symptoms never return?
>After reading about 20 books on fibromyalgia, I have
>learned that it is a dis-ease that is prescribed when
>a doctor doesn't have a clue as to what's going on with a person.
What about the physical markers, then? What are they? People with
fibromyalgia have sensitive trigger points. How does that translate into a
kundalini paradigm? Peple with fibromyalgia have a detectable increase of
Substance P in their spinal fluid -- as much as three times the amount in a
healthy person. How does that translate into a kundalini paradigm?
So long as there are observable markers in a person with fibromyalgia that
aren't present in a person without fibromyalgia, it's difficult for me to
believe that it's not a "real" condition.
I've read that 2-5% of the population has fibromyalgia; does that mean that
2-5% (or more) of the population is going through a kundalini awakening?
That's millions of people....why do so few of them even think of kundalini
as a possibility? Why aren't many many more alternative and complementary
health practitioners speaking about kundalini?
>I hope anything I said will shed some light on this for you.
It raised even more questions, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.
Agape,
M
--
http://www.magdalenemeretrix.com
"Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something."
-- Henry David Thoreau
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
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