To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/12/23 10:08
Subject: [K-list] (unknown)
From: Shadowspace
On 2001/12/23 10:08, Shadowspace posted thus to the K-list:
Chris,
The somnambulism of these holidays and human life overall is remarkable.
It is easy to compare this to animals rushing into smaller and smaller
pens within pens within pens, with the illusion that being in a smaller
space brings them all closer. Our race is paranoid from head to toes,
seeking safety within the thorny underbrush rather than in the open
field.
This morning was the beginning of the end of me. Consciousness "of" is
being eroded away, leaving simple "Consciousness." "Your" experience is
beginning to manifest in "me," I think, to needlessly distinguish. There
is the feeling of being inside of what my senses detect, like all things
are mirrors of consciousness that all reflect each other. Comparison and
thought only dampen the experience of life. I feel like I'm awakening
from a painful dream that I was just the monkey and not the whole zoo,
that I was the banana and not the whole fruit basket, to rephrase
something Carlos Santana once said. At first I tried to disappear into a
purely internal world, calling everything a lie. I've realized now that
there is no difference. It's all frosting on the same cake.
"Following our will and whim, we may just go where no one's been. Ride
the spiral to the end, and may just go where no one's been. Reading up
and reaching out, reaching for whatever may bewilder me, whatever may be
will to me. Spiral out, keep going."
-Tool, "Lateralis"
-Nick
__________
"I kept dreaming of reality, and every time something awakened me. It was
like if the screen even began to clear, revealing its true nature,
something flickered and instead of looking at the surface, I would find
myself distracted by what was projected onto it. The flickers will
continue, but I won't be looking. This is the beginning of the end of
me."
__________
"I keep dreaming of reality, and every time something awakens me. The
idiot box, pride, art, language...it's like every time the screen even
begins to clear, revealing its true nature, something flickers and
instead of looking at the surface, I find myself distracted by what's
projected onto it."
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