To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/11/09 14:26
Subject: [K-list] Re: DXM and misc. observations/remarks
From: Joshua Sutterfield
On 2001/11/09 14:26, Joshua Sutterfield posted thus to the K-list:
Hmm, the two previous posts about eternal now are primarily what I'm
responding to although I can't figure out what specifically to quote. I
dig though.
The idea that God is found through being in Eternal Now, or recognizing
that that is all that is: I think we can figure out why that is, or how
that is so, without entirely invalidating the concepts of "past" and
"future" as things we cannot think about or model or be conscious of.
Yet still the concept is pure and true. But it is a "yes" to things,
without being a "no" to other things. I actually think there is
conceptually only one thing that can be such. That is somewhat God to
me. Also, I forget which post but the idea was mentioned of deciding
your own God and his traits, and the idea that we each have our own.
It is very much a religious thing to say there is one and only one, or
that all others are false. Yet the concept (however much we fail to
reproduce it in our minds, and only own a "local copy") is of One (at
least the concept of which I speak). It is the highest.. it is an
inclusion, it is even a paradox, because it rejects none. All are God,
but all are One. There can be no other because there IS no other.
Not like this religion or that religion, where there is the devil and
demons and bad wrong Gods and you must pick the right one. Still, all
those "bad things" are useful representations for us, of vices, of
mistakes on a path to, yes, a One god. The thing is to not name it, or
make it so simple that it must be true, or that it lives by being true
and false (at the beginning there was nothing, and nothing was likely to
be true or false, nor did true and false have any meaning, nor was it any
more a beginning than an end).
Goodness I like the way this post was going the first time, before I
resized netscape and realized using netscape to post was a bad idea.
I should return to Eternal Now (let go of the netscape failure in the
past, and also return to the key concept I was addressing in that past).
Now is a unity, as everything else turns out to be, a unity of a tao, in
this case of past and future. We lie on the boundary between the two,
where each moment (there is only one moment though) future is becoming
past, this BECOMING is the only thing that is real.. neither exists alone,
they only function as concepts. This becoming is creation and is a
perfect expression of God. "Real" for me, means aware. Awareness is all
that is. It also happens to be love, because I choose it to be.. no,
really because anything other than love is hiding, is fear, is choosing to
not be aware (of another soul or your own, or of their unity and
co-awareness).
Maybe I should post something I wrote to myself last night after reading
something some big-special-yogi-guy said about enlightenment. In short
what I was talking about was this unity, in another sense than
past+future, rather of desirelessness and desire, because the former is
both a fulfillment and a negation of the other.. it is birth and
immediate death, an equasion of birth and death, also thus a
transcendence of karma.. a standing outside and recognizing we are the
whole process.. we are the light, not the electric or the magnetic
alone. We are Karma. So anyways, this unity of tao is what I see as
God, is what I see as the only thing that provides a perfect
synchronicity. It is, for me, a pure concept, a self-generating concept,
it is the creator of all, and it is what it creates. Its truth is unity
but its way is separation. Yet neither half exists, only the process
exists -- each half exists only in knowing they are one with the whole,
and thus not half at all. The process itself, the unity of seeing it as
one, the continual perfect alternation (how each half implies the other
yet does not exist alone unless it becomes both) -- this is the root of
awareness.. when this "clicks" in a person's mind, when they see their
awareness and its nature, its impossible yet impossible-to-be-impossible
nature, they may recognize awareness is itself God, and this awareness is
the act of God being aware of itself (God's whole "goal", or rather his
only POSSIBLE goal, the essence of his own self-creation).
This for me is a perfect source of synchronicity, and thus the concept
(someone mentioend) of each choosing his own God is somewhat a stand-in,
a tool. I mentioned it myself, that it soudned reasonable to decide
god's gender is yours. Because that is where the experience occurs.
This is where you start. Where you end is everywhere, everyone. For me,
the truth is too perfect and simple to not be the same one truth for
all. Yet it entirely a mistake to insist in a dogmatic way that this is
so. It is a yes, not a no. It is all ways, but it IS one way.. that is
also the very essence of the miracle. There is only one. We are it.. we
love us.. but its very nature is to split itself to experience itself.
It experiences itself through locality. The generation of all its
experience is centered around separation, around forgetting, and around
here vs. there, this vs. that, the concept of locality. For ONE to know
itself, each of its infinite parts must (like a beautiful perfect
fractal) recognize itself as one, and thus recognize it is one of many.
But then the next step is to say NO, 1+1+1+1+1+....=ONE. I am all this,
I am all that.
UM so.. yes, Eternal Now is therefore locality. It is our only true
perspective, it is the only anchor of experience we have as material
brainbodies (manifestations of light, even Einstein knew). We pass
through time by SPLITTING it.. this is how we experience it. A split of
past/future, which only exists for us, is only known to us by
experiencing a locality, but recognizing that the locality is the
boundary between the two, the essence of our awareness lies in the unity
there.
I have lately just started to come close to actually "feeling" some sort
of boundary of body and mind, and finding when in intense sexual places,
if I let go of mind and let go of body, I fall right in the center, right
in the now between them, where they are the same thing.. where my brain is
actual gray matter and liquid, yet my body pulses with electrical symbolic
modeling processes.
But anyways, about this locality of now in which we dwell, surely we must
recognize that it is the ROOT of God.. it is the generating point of his
awareness (ignore the gender of "his"), but he comes, now, to know
himself OUTSIDE of time, he knows himself as the CREATOR of time.
Coinsider this, not only is there a duality within time, but (remember the
fractals) time itself is part of a splitting, it is created (so I
theorize) by light. Time and space are the two things which come out of
light, which are chosen by light.. light is the principle which binds
space to time, and makes them perfectly intertwined, each causing the
other, each making the other "real", but in truth only as their unity in
light. This is an exciting time because we're right on the boundary
between scientific understanding and spiritual understanding, which I
believe is the final unity which will save the world. All the mystic folk
been saying for years that we are light, that all is light, but this seems
so figurative, yet now... holy shit ITS TRUE, we're finding it out.
Another related fact.. may give you an idea how space and time unite..
the speed of light is absolute. Even as you approach its speed, it still
travels the speed of light relative to your frame of reference. AND also
it still travels only the speed of light for a person at rest. Time and
space actually shift and bend (the way WE see them) to make this true,
because they are born out of light, are one with light.. it is no indirect
consequence, but a direct manifestation. We might substitute "awareness"
for "reference" a few sentences back.
So ultimately this eternal now (the seeming contradiction suggests where
it leads us) leads us to eternity, something outside of time, something
not here nor there, yet everywhere, something not coming nor past, but
simply always there. Experiencing this is thus perfect peace because
indeed it is perfect transcendence, it is a perfect promise, which you
yourself are both the benefactor and creator of, and cannot miss out on,
nor betray no matter what you do in any one body, any one locality.
Beep.
So I can't figure out if I had anything else to say, I guess that's a good
stopping point. Oh, well I'll tie it up with the earlier part. So yes,
we are in an eternal now.. yet each point comes and goes, and can be
modelled with thought and this is not entirely a fallacy as long as we
recognize it is a fallacy. Heheheh. Just like we function in bodies, I
act like your soul is not mine, that what "awareness" is, is different
from one person to the next (we are confusing it with
thought/consciousness/body when it is the awareness OF those things, the
very center), that matter is "real", but it's all a damn lie. It's just a
useful convention for communication, like personifying God.
But of course, when we are totally inside now.. now becomes every time..
as it indeed does.. we pass through every moment, uniting them as one..
so being inside now, inside the nature of what "now" is, is being in their
unity, and ultimately as I say we are outside of time, thus all moments
are now.. nothing that exists cannot be now, thus we do have access to the
past and future if we choose, yet they will not be past and future, only
now.
I hush.
Josh
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