To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/11/07 09:05
Subject: [K-list] kundalini and sexuality
From: jennifer nm
On 2001/11/07 09:05, jennifer nm posted thus to the K-list:
Hi again folks;
I'm hoping for your kind input on this topic, which is a sensitive one for
me:
Several years ago, I had what I *think* was a kundalini awakening from an
acupuncture treatment. A needle was inserted into my abdomen below the
navel. (the acupuncturist said at the time that she didn't usually do that
point since it was a very strong sexual-spiritual point, and if the person
was not prepared it could be devastating--I was naive, and said go ahead).
The next morning, I felt this strange and uncomfortable line of energy
running from that point on my navel to my genitals. I felt alot of anxiety
along with this. Within a day or two, I started having sexual feelings
around women, after being/feeling strictly heterosexual my whole life.
(Meaning, when around women, images of women, I actually felt what seemed to
be a reflexive sort of mini-orgasm, focussed in my genitals) These feelings
continue off and on to this day, and I still can't integrate/make sense of
them. I also have a burning/energetic sensation in my abdomen off and on,
usually accompanied with a feeling of grief/anxiety. I've experienced bouts
of unexplained grief/anxiety since this happened, but don't know if it's
part of K-awakening or just a response to the wierdness and overwhelming
feeling of it all. I don't feel an emotional pull towards being with women
(and continue to have that emotional pull towards men), but there is this
physical thing that comes up. It has been so disturbing to me that I feel
that I've developed a phobic kind of response to it, which seems to make it
even more intense. I note that if I don't resist the feeling, it dissipates
a great deal in frequency and intensity. I'm in a relatively new
relationship with a great guy and am really struggling with what this all
means and how to proceed with the relationship. If that acupuncture needle
brought up latent bisexuality, I need to deal with that and accept it. But
it doesn't feel like that's quite the right explanation. I've talked to one
other woman who had an "accidental" K-awakening after acupuncture as well.
She said that, while heterosexual and happily married, she did feel same-sex
attraction for the first few years of her awakening. She accredited it to
becoming in tune with the goddess.
Have others heard of this/experienced this?
Grateful for any thoughts on this,
Jennifer
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
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