To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/10/31 10:47
Subject: [K-list] Fw: Fw: Tantra Course Notes
From: L. J. Klinsky
On 2001/10/31 10:47, L. J. Klinsky posted thus to the K-list:
----- Original Message -----
From: L. J. Klinsky
To: MystressATnospamkundalini-gateway.org
Sent: Wednesday, October 31, 2001 7:41 AM
Subject: Re: Fw: Tantra Course Notes
Apparently you didn't read my second post, the one where I offered a very hefty energy exchange not in the form of money, but in the form of services, for your gifts. Just because I don't believe in money as a good form of energy exchange for me, doesn't mean I'm a bad person.
I think you are a wonderfully wise human and I've respected all of what you've said up to now. However, I don't appreciate you wanting to "weed out people like me who are too deep in scarcity consciousness to be motivated to give something back for what they get." On this, my dear lady, you are sadly mistaken. Words can hurt others really badly, and I don't think this was your intent, but it was so. If you would put your heart out to my heart you would see that I want more than anything to give back for what I got from you. I said I was out of work in my last post, and I am trying to grow through my money issues, hoping for help. My feelings are as valid as anyone elses, and for the first time in my life I'm feeling like I deserve respect. I'm sure you wouldn't want to quash my need to feel good about myself, as it's been taking a lifetime to gain a spark of that. I feel very ungrounded suddenly but in a feeble way I will try to express my self.
I don't appreciate you saying that I "really think [your] gifts, time and attention [are] worthless." Perhaps you have something to learn this time around. I know I have an infinite amount of learning to do, but my intentions are pure and loving. I sense a projection here. I also sense your pain, the pain of your past of giving too much and getting little or nothing in return. I am sorry I sparked a nasty opening and that I hurt you; that was not my intent either. How could I possibly know what you've been through with that issue. I wish I had of, but apparently, again, this exchange was meant to be for some reason. Words are horrible ways to communicate sometimes; you've said this in your lessons as well. I wish you only good, and you may still take me up on the offer I made in the second post if you'd like. (I sense that, after reading your lesson on selfless service, that you'll find something else wrong with me. Oh, growing is a lonely one sometimes...)
Leslee
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