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To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/10/11 08:42
Subject: [K-list] Forgiveness
From: Xerxenca

On 2001/10/11 08:42, Xerxenca posted thus to the K-list:

In a message dated 10/11/01 11:04:46 AM Eastern Daylight Time,
AaronASATnospambigfoot.com writes:

> In my experience forgiving, true forgiving, is relinquishing of those
> egotistical tendancies to place our attention on who owe's who what. Only
> in
> this release is there true forgiveness. Love, Aaron <3
>

I agree Aaron.

In a way I see forgiveness as a way of "getting real" and demythologizing
things. What I've found is that when I have NOT forgiven someone I continue
to hurt myself for what "they" did. I take on the victim drama or a more
aggressive one. What I can best do is give voice (to myself, if no one else)
to what my feelings are about the "incident" and what I would have rather
they have done. It's important to get clear on my feelings and expectations
so that they aren't just unconsciously projecting out there. Then I
acknowledge how I'd rather have liked for things to happen -- but didn't.
What were my expectations that weren't met?

Here's a way I've learned:

"I don't want to hurt myself any more for what you have done. I'm tired of
the discomfort I get from all this. I want to finish this now. I choose to
heal this and let it go completely. I am choosing to be free of it. I would
have preferred that you -- but you didn't do that and I cancel that
expectation. I cancel all demands, expectations, and conditions that you do
(or say or be) what I would have preferred in the past and now. I cancel the
demand that you be any certain way. You are totally responsible for your
actions. I give that responsibility back to you now and I release you now to
your own good. I let myself feel the Love that is part of me, that has
protected me, loved me, and nurtured me all my life."

Blocking "bad" feelings is sort of marinating in toxins. But to get rid of
them you have to actually look at them -- it's not just about rushing to
"sweetness and light stuff" -- it is an energy dynamic for healing yourself.

Sorry for preaching to the choir here -
Onward


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