To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/09/16 08:15
Subject: [K-list] Who am I? Looking for advice....
From: Unit1021
On 2001/09/16 08:15, Unit1021 posted thus to the K-list:
Hello all,
Well things have only been getting more better/strange for me here.
There is no doubt in my mind at all about this whole process.
Older women tend to like me a lot as I ask lots of questions about
everything and they know things I dont, and they get all excited that
I am learning about this stuff. Now I was ok with this but I asked
Goddess for the younger girls that know this stuff. In a joking way I
said I wanted a nice redhead girl that can understand me and I can
relate to as I simply cannot relate to anyone else in my area right
now.
What I asked is impossible. Everyone in Southern NH is an idiot.
This is my personal experience with them since moving here. Thats why
I said it as a joke.
So you can imagine my shocking surprise when I am suddenly having an
inteligent conversation with this very pretty and sharply dressed
redheaded girl about spirituality at a speaking event. She is going
to be a councilor, she told me she is going through pretty much the
same things as I am right now,(almost) and about just letting go and
dont fight change and feeling better about the total change in her
life, even though its not what you had originaly planed. Ok, it goes
on and on, we have a LOT in common. Someone told me the day before..
If I follow my path, things will come to me.... Whatever, I said...
This is so unreal... but real....
OK. She brought up some questions that I didnt know how to answer.
What religion or faith are you? I was going to say all.. But then I
know those religions that only broadcast hate and repression and
horrable things. No way is that part of Goddess, or anything. So I
was going to say Goddess, then I didnt want to put to much info out
right then as it was a christian meeting hall that the event was
going on in. And As you know there is a reason to be wary in there.
So I said... I'm really not to sure right now...
Should I just start telling what the real deal is? And just tell
them that Goddess is it? Or Spirit? Or Universe? I dont want to argue
with anyone on religions. Its stuped. There is only one idea. Goddess
loves you and wants to help you. So let her do her thing and get out
of her way. Thats it. Anything else is man made controll. I dunno...
Then after I told her all the stuff I was learning about she wanted
to know what I was going to use this knowledge for... And I had no
idea... at all! Something. But I still learn like crazy. So again
with a confused look on my face...
"I'm not really sure right now... but I'll let you know when I do.."
What do we do with all this knowledge?
Then some people were talking about healing with higher vibration
homeopathic remedies for the higher spiritual areas of emotions and
things and somone brought up. "Why dont you just skip all of the
medicine and go right to the source for healing?" Meaning Goddess...
And the reply was, well some people can do that, but we cant so we
use these medicines" So In my head I just thought..
"What do you mean? Thats easy, even I can do that."
Now I'm glad I didnt blurt that out cause I can only do this on
myself at the moment, but it caught me..
Who am I that I can ask Goddess for stuff.. anything... and it
happens or things show up???? Am I special? Or can anyone on the
planet do this stuff? I wanted to just say,
"Hey you idiots! Heres how you get stuff!"
But, what will that do to them? What will that do to the world? What
will it do to me?
Now I know this is a Kundalini awakening board and I've read stories
about some pretty drastic things happening durring an awakening..
yoga postures, past lives, waving spines.. etc..
I HAVE NEVER FELT THESE THINGS!
People talk of enlightenment and things. I AM NOT ENLIGHTENED! I'm
just Sean. All of these things that I am feeling are things that are
not a new thing to me. They are a return of what I used to feel long
ago before being beaten down into depression. I am remembering things
I used to be able to do, but lost. A return to who I really am.
Awakening? No. A re-awakening. Now I just know the right words to
say, the right thoughts to think. The correct knowledge I need.
So tell me. Am I special or just another guy? Can everyone get
Goddess to do things for them? Can I tell them how to do it?
The bubbles flow over my heart. Every day things change my life.
Everyday I am stronger. Every day Goddess takes a part of me and re-
makes it the right way. Soon, I will become...... WHAT???!!!!! Will
I open a shop in town to fix people? Will I become a great composer?
What do I tell people??? WHO AM I? Can I even tell them what I can
do?
Thanks..
Sean
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
DISCLAIMER!
Home | Archive Index | Search the archives | Subscribe
K. List FAQ | Kundalini FAQs | Signs and Symptoms | Awakening Experiences | K. list Polls | Member Essays | Meditations | List Topics | Art Gallery | Cybrary | Sitemap | Email the moderators.
symbol.