To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/09/02 17:56
Subject: [K-list] From morbid to Beautiful
From: mgb
On 2001/09/02 17:56, mgb posted thus to the K-list:
Ok, it's about the fears again but this is insight. I sent
out some messages asking about insight on Fear and they
were very helpful, actually they made me realize something
very important which is that I was not embracing my inner
shadow! I was trying to get rid of it, silly me, i'ts also
a part of myself. A common mistake is that yes, we dont
love the tiger, or the grizzly as much as we should. We
lock it up in a cage and try to control it, as a result it
strikes back (as anxiety, paranoia, etc), naturally because
it's being neglected. We dont give it life and harmonize it
with everything else so it finds its little world in our
dreams..."hey if u wont pay attention to me, i'll have my
party when you're asleep!". I could keep going, but u know
what i mean, in simple terms we should not reject any part
of ourselves, let's bring everything up to the surface and
let all our instruments play in harmony, and not judge that
part as "fear" actually. I mean it becomes fear because
it's something that we keep inside in a closet and dont set
it free, so it represses itself and logically it causes
moments of disharmony. Of course for the more spiritually
evolved, you may have already transcended the "inner
shadow" more than others,you will probably speak the Truth
more purely than I. But since I just started, I have u
could say a part of me that is obvioiusly not in harmony, i
actually dont like to call it fear. I'm trying to merge
that inner shadow with the Light, to embrace it. After all
Love is the cure, not ignorance, and that is a law that
applies to everything. So what is morbid anyway, oh, well
i had a vision as i was bonding with my inner shadow (in my
dreams sometimes it comes as a grizzly bear), when i was
meditating i remembered a dream that i had about the
grizzly approaching me and me running away from it. well,
i meditated and i saw myself in the cave and the bear came
in, big huge scary-looking beast at first, then it just
lied next to me causing me no harm. so I sat there
contemplating it, beautiful creature. Yes, i did want to
hug it and kiss it and cuddle with it like a huge tedy, ok
i did, i confess. But anyway, after that I realized
something else, the valid posibility. This bear is gonna
get hungry sooner or later and I'm good meat (pardon the
saying) for its appetite. So I entered a state of
acceptance that my flesh and bones would be a healthy meal
for this animal. And what I am is not my body so what's
the problem, whats the fear, I'm actually being logical and
generous and we're also a part of the food chain. So I
imagine the bear approaching me, and he starts to eat my
body, rips away the skin, bones, actually we probably taste
really good since we eat all kinds of stuff. And he's so
happy and satisfied, sucking the last pieces of flesh from
the bones (excuse me for being so graphic, please i dont
mean to offense ok, i just think it's beautiful). Anyway,
my body is dead, and I'm still with the grizzly. I, the
Essence, the observer, was the same from the moment I saw
the grizzly come in the cave, to the moment after my
"death", so why did I fear? Our vehicles are just not pure
enough for the Essence to live freely, for it knows no
fear, it knows no mortality. I think these images of
"death" are good therapy u could say to expand our purity,
to free yourself from unconscious emotions/thoughts of
mortality. As an artist i'd like to say that
drawing/painting our images of our inner shadow helps us
(in a more active sense) appreciate and love the
unconscious, bring it to the surface, see beyond its
irrational appearance because what lies beneath is the
Soul, "fear" is only created in the incomplete
interpretation of the psyche.
Love, light, Peace,
maria
=====
SAT NAM
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