To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/08/01 14:03
Subject: [K-list] Re:shamanic initiation
From: Joyful Fairy
On 2001/08/01 14:03, Joyful Fairy posted thus to the K-list:
Here's Paco's email that he sent me. :)
ug, sorry it's all out of alignment.
Rebeckah
hi there,
it felt good to read your post because i identified with your
feelings,
especially when you said , "what if i don't want to become a shaman?"
funny, i am in the midst of a shamanic initiation/awakening which
began about
less than five years ago in my last year of college, like you i
refused it
and was terrified of becoming, for me its a spritual warrior, adn
like i said
i was terrified, it shatters your sense of reality and stability
however, you know there's a lot of help out there if you just seek it
out, in
particular there's a network called the Spiritual Emergence Network
and it
gives out references and support to people undergoing spiritual
emergence and
crisis, because often this is a crisis in someone's life, htey give
you
numbers for therapists in your area who have training in these areas,
many
who have gone through the same stuff, whether kundalini awakening,
shamanic
inititiation, psychic opening, ufo abduction, near death experiences,
or even
existential crisis, among other stuff, they're based in san
francisco, CA
and their telephone number is (415) 648-2610, i suggest you call htem
up and
chat with them and see what they can do, they also have a website,
there's a
couple you can see, one try searching "spiritual emergence and CIIS"
CIIS is
the California Institute of Integral Studies, the school from which
the
network sprang form i believe, another is do a search for "spiritual
emergence and David Lukoff" he is a pioneer in the field and has
developed a
website for this stuff, both are great websites, another search
is "Shared
Transformations" a website about spiritual emergence, but it focuses
more on
kundalini i think
if you can't find these send a post and i'll get the web addresses
if Spiritual Emergence Network cannot find you a therapist in your
area, it
may be a good idea to drive a couple of hours if you need to, if
possible, i
don't know where you live, but also if this doenst work maybe you
could find
a good traditional therapist who is open to it and can guide you
through any
issues that come up, or even a healer, someone you connect with i
think is
important. I had a transpersonal therapist for a short while who
introduced
me to alot of stuff, however i moved and eventually worked with a
regular
therapist who helped me alot.
let me say this too, i tried to do it alone for good parts of the
intense
periods, i suggest you find someone to help you, you do not have to
do it
alone!
though also when you say you don't want ot cheat by seeing someone, i
know
what you're talking about, its like a trial where you feel you MUST
you MUST,
or else! for me i was afraid of being a coward and not following my
heart,
for me this would be the worst thing i could do to myself, this fear
propelled me onto accept it, i think that's probably what your guides
want is
for you to surrendur, i think you can get help with this, i don't see
why
not, Ask yourself, go inside and see what your heart says, and listen
to the
little voice, that says please listen to me.
though, one thing i think is very important for you to know, although
i know
you're seeking for guides and a map, which i believe can be very
important
and helpful, i'll share that for me it was important to understnad
that each
person's path is different, for you it might be different than anyone
else's
path, from anyone on this list's or mine or any you read about, YOU
define
your path, you can also have power over how you want to do this, i
know the
pressure is intense and scary sometimes (from the spirits) and we do
have to
like the ohter post said, surrendur, that is part of the process,
(for me it
was) but you're not surrenduring to anyone or anything, you are
surrenduring
to yourself, to your own process, YOU are the guide on this path,
nobody
else, waht you believe is what you will create,
the transformation is like going into a new stage of life where you
are just
growing into a new part of yourself, your destiny, if you are
destined to do
this,
i thought my journey was going to be like dan millman's (Way of the
Peaceful
Warrior) adn my beliefs created my experience of how some of hte
episodes of
my initiation went, i suggest you ask god foir guidance, ask Him/Her,
whatever you call IT, ask god- go inside yourself and ask god to
guide you
through this, by connecting with god you are connecting with
something more
powerful than anything, more powerful than your fear etc., also it
will guide
you to understanding and to the help you desire.
these are just my thoughts and i hope they help. i am still in hte
initiation process and i am still learning, and my advice comes
purely from
experience
furhter i am still learning what exactly the concept shaman implies,
and
again for me it may be different than for anyone else, besides the
fact that
there may be core features to it, but again are we not moving into a
new
point of development where boundaries are crossed and new definitions
are
made, or rather we expand our understanding of stuff? I don't konw
i'm still
learning. a definition is relative anyhow isn't it?
one last thing, i think a discussion group for shamanism would be
great,
there is one at The foundation for shamanic studies website but its
currently
down.
one last last thing, i'd be interested to hear what your experiences
are that
lead you to believe you may be having a call to shamanism. if you
like.
good luck and i hope its all helpful.
Paco
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
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