To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/05/25 23:48
Subject: [K-list] intro & juicy kundalini story!
From: Godchild 777
On 2001/05/25 23:48, Godchild 777 posted thus to the K-list:
Hi folks,
I just found this particular forum tonite. Interesting personalities
here...
I've been doing a lot of searching lately for info on this kundalini
stuff, trying to understand just what the heck is going on.
By way of introduction: My name is David (a.k.a. godchild_777), age
27, live in Chicago, work as free-lance writer and nutrition products
distributor. (Check out my sig at the bottom of the msg... be sure to
click ;-) I also like singing and I attempt to write songs in various
genres.
Spiritual: I am a son of Yahweh, following the Way of Yahshua
haMaschiach, or Yeshua the Messiah, or just Jesus the Christ if you
like. But I'm not fond of "Jesus," being a rather poor
transliteration of his real name; nor do I really like the
label "Christian," in part because of all the nasty things that have
been associated with the name of Christ down through the years. But
to most of you, that's nit-picking ...
I was raised a Christian and have had an interest in things spiritual
from an early age. I was dunked by the Baptists at age 10, and by age
11 I had read the Bible cover to cover, except, I think, for part of
the Psalms. (It was not ye old King James--it was a special kids'
version.)
My teenage years were filled with interest in the paranormal and the
occult. It was more curiosity than actual practice. I read about and
tried to do Silva Mind Control (carefully avoiding the "spiritual
guide" exercises as I believed, and still believe, that
such "spiritual guides" do not have your best interest at heart). I
read about ESP, ghosts, vampires, elves and other creatures,
demonology, magick, astral projection, lucid dreaming, dowsing, yoga,
the Bermuda Triangle, etc., in addition to continuing to learn about
the Bible. In addition I read about what are considered more normal
aspects of psychiatry such as autohypnosis and neuro-linguistic
programming. (Someday I'd like to become certified in NLP.)
Despite all this study, I never messed with any sort of occultism,
nor did I consciously meditate with the intent of manipulating
energy.
I never practiced any yoga formally--except for some breathing
exercises I found in a voice book, when I was about 16. (At the time,
I was an aspiring singer.) Some of the exercises involved focusing on
your "vital energies" located in the nether regions--supposedly you
are able to channel such energies into your voice, enhancing its
sound and power. The book taught that you can draw upon the energies
of the body's "energy centers" to enhance the voice and also produce
other emotional qualities such as courage, love, creativity, etc.
At times I did experience a slight stirring of the energy, as the
book said would happen. Once, while lying on my back doing one of the
exercises which included relaxation, deep breathing, and holding the
breath, I once experienced a burst of pleasure the likes of which I
had never felt. I wondered what it was. But I was never able to get
it again. Subsequently, I lost interest in that material.
That was about 11 years ago. About six years ago, in college, I took
an introductory tai chi class.
Also, a frequent happening from my late teens to this day, has been a
phenomenon that often worried me. It only happened when I slept on my
back. I'd wake up with a loud, rushing sound in my ears. Sometimes it
was a real awakening, other times it was a false awakening (dreaming
that I had awoken). Often, in the latter cases, it would seem that
something about my surroundings looked or felt odd--as if there was
some kind of strange film over it, and the air seemed charged in some
way. And I would feel as if someone else were present in the room.
Often, I would also be paralyzed, which of course was scary. To make
things worse, I had read that this same type of scenario often
preceded astral projections. The last thing I wanted to do was
astrally project--what if someone else decides to move into my body
while I'm away?
One or two times I saw a figure in a dark hooded cloak at the foot of
my bed. It was not until this year that I heard, via Art Bell, that
such apparitions are becoming quite common and have been
dubbed "Shadow People." (Once, I "awakened" to find
Mr. Shadow
whacking me across the face with what felt like a pillow--honest to
God! =8-O)
Okay, now on to the more impressive stuff.
* Fall 1998:
The first somewhat significant episode of K occurred during a time of
intense prayer and devotion. When I have time, I like to go on long
walks at night to pray to the Father. Sometimes I'll even drive out
to a quiet country road and take a walk. It's much easier to pray in
such a setting. And by the way, probably most of my prayers do get
answered. ;-)
After one such night I came home, got into bed, and continued to pray
in bed. Part of my prayer was that I could be filled with the Holy
Spirit.
As I lay there, I began to feel something. It started at the base of
my spine--it was a hot, but not painful, sensation that seemed to
slowly move about halfway up my spine. I also felt it engulf my
torso. It was undulating, pulsating, kind of like waves, or like a
flame. Or like someone had turned a radiator on in my lower torso. I
also had some other, very unusual and very pleasurable sensations in
a certain place, accompanied by what felt like a rush of blood into
my pelvic area. I had not even remotely been thinking of carnal
pleasures at the time.
This whole thing lasted from five to ten minutes, and I just lay
there, basking in the euphoria, praising God silently, and wondering
what would happen next, and how high the fire was going to rise. It
seemed to stop about halfway up my spine. I shifted a couple of
times, just to make sure the sensation wasn't being caused my me
putting the wrong kind of pressure on my back, or pinching a nerve or
something. But the sensations continued.
The best way to describe the whole incident was "orgasmic."
It happened again in the spring of last year, only a bit more
intensely. That episode was followed by several more. But the biggest
so far happened this year, on January 5, 2001.
Again, I was sleeping on my back. I had a semi-lucid dream about
flying--not uncommon for me, except this time I didn't seem to be
afraid of heights or feel the gravity as usual. I flew up into the
night sky, out into space; there was a hole in the "top" of space,
where light shone through. I headed for the hole. Once inside I
noticed a sun-like light, very brilliant, but not blinding. Like a
moth, I flew straight for it. The light, if I remember correctly, was
sort of misty and vaporous, opaque, as if it were hiding something.
It seemed that I had only gotten to the outer layers, and I wanted to
know what was further inside.
Just then, I woke up--with exquisite sensations, not only in the
pelvis and lower back like before, but shooting, gushing, throughout
my body. The only way to describe it is *full body orgasm*.
I saw lights flashing (rhythmically, perhaps 3 or 4 times per
second), and in my ears was a loud, rushing, churning sound. I got
the sense that the sound came from something circular, going back and
forth, like a washing machine agitator--churn, churn, churn, churn.
In fact, it seemed to be circular, and something made me think of yin
and yang, those two opposing forces, going back and forth, back and
forth. It seemed to fill my whole head.
I remember thinking something like: "WHOA ... have I hit the jackpot
this time or what!") But it was also a bit unsettling. I said a
prayer to God: "If this is from You, let it continue; but if not, I
want nothing to do with it."
Gradually, the sensations and sound subsided and the energy was
reduced to the more familiar simmering, undulating heat in my lower
back, which continued for five or ten minutes.
Since January, I've had many episodes of this, none as intense as
the
one on 1/5. But I had one in March or April that was particularly
prolonged. It did indeed feel delicious, but it kept me awake half
the night!
Although I'm not fearful of this energy any more, I am still a bit
wary about its origin and what it is trying to do. Fellow Christians
have not been very helpful (most in my circle are conservative
evangelicals, and are not much into mystical experience as are the
Pentecostals and charismatics), especially when I mentioned that
kundalini, in the Hindu religion, is symbolized by a serpent. Well,
you know what the Bible says about serpents.
One minister with whom I regularly correspond e-mailed me and
said, "Be careful. Nothing like this has ever happened to me."
I have pondered whether this might be some kind of undesirable or
harmful thing. But the thing is, I haven't been seeking it at all. I
have only sought God, and have done so by the most reliable road map
that I know of--the Bible.
One theory I've been working on is that the Creator has built this
into each and every human being. It is a part of our spirit, and in
times of great spiritual yearning our spirit attempts to ascend to
contact His. However, I still believe that only by His reaching down
to contact us can the circuit be completed.
Also, more troubling is the fact that some of the "adverse"
symptoms
have seemingly begun to show up too. Within a month of my trip
through space, ;-) I began to get what I thought was a stomach ulcer.
I also began to get headaches (with the feeling that my head was
swelling), chest pain and pressure (as if a balloon were being
inflated inside my chest), heart palpitations, dizziness, weakness,
and tremors. A few times, I was afraid I was having a heart attack!
The doc ruled out heart attack and stomach ulcer, and sent me home
with some acid-blocker, which seems to have helped somewhat, but so,
I think, has the nutrition stuff that I take). Since then, I have
read that these stomach and chest problems commonly accompany
Kundalini.
I thought about something I read in "The Practice of the Presence of
God," a book by Brother Lawrence, a radical Catholic monk. He was
unusual for a Catholic, in that he believed that "we should establish
ourselves in a sense of God's presence by continually conversing with
Him." One thing he wrote was:
"If sometimes my thoughts wander from by necessity or infirmity, I am
presently recalled by inward motions so charming and delicious that I
am ashamed to mention them."
Now what does that sound like? ;-)
Comments?
*****P*E*A*C*E**L*O*V*E**&**B*L*E*S*S*I*N*G*S*****
David H
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
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