To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/05/07 16:46
Subject: Re: [K-list] Karma long steph ramble.........thoughts
From: Stephanie
On 2001/05/07 16:46, Stephanie posted thus to the K-list:
(Steph: "reply to all" posts to the list.. this only came to me, and it is
apparent you intended it for the list, so I have redirected it. I spell
checked it too.. LOL!! Love you. Blessings! )
> At 02:06 AM 5/6/01, Pepper J. Baxter wrote:
> . I didn't steal
> from her, or
> >others, so why did I get stolen from?
Stephanie <songofsongs_2000ATnospamyahoo.com> wrote:
Pepper, I don't know you, but I like Mystress's point
on this.
I mean, it brought you to a higher awareness, sitting
on the mountain of yourself and assessing and
observing.
However, when you speak of "stealing,"
that is scarcity thinking, though it may be subtle,
it is there, as an undercurrent. Check it out and see
for yourself.
I have, after many years, come to the point where I
do not concern myself with those who "steal" from me,
for the most part. I'm sure I get off sometimes but I
really have come to see what Jesus means when he says
if someone takes your cloak give him your shirt too
(paraphrase big time).
That is their issue. your issue is your response and
that is based on whether you are operating out of
love or attachment. However, don't judge yourself for
attachments. You can become attached to the goal
of being detached, and that too is a trap. However,
we are eternal really, and we have time to go in
circles here and there. Sometimes I think we do it
for fun, handicap ourselves to see just how much we
can do with pared down resources from the Self.
And from where I stand, and energy is the Wellspring
of GOD within, the Divine Union within me.
And so it is eternal and though energy may appear to
have fluctuations of availability, that is just so I
can learn to better manage my own energy resources.
It has been a long road, still is, but now I don't
worry about the things that used to freak me out, like
the "energy vampires" who seek out beings of Light
because they don't have their own Source.
I found loving the thief can confuse the thief into
actual enlightenment (or a degree thereof).
Seriously. If one experiences true unconditional love
in the face of being seen in totality, and having all
that acknowledged and loved and no judgements or
condemnation or piety or holier than thou or
conversion agenda's it is transforming. If the thief
is seen and loved, is to happen to someone caught in
the act, transformation is a seed that is inevitably
planted.
Now it can become a transformation towards more
deliberate darkness, but it will at least be
conscious, and if it is conscious, then it has a
chance of pulling into a different awareness.
I mean, we have all "stolen" from others energetically
whether we realize it or not.
If you are able to physically see energy, which has
been my lot (or curse or burden, and I have others as
well), you see the actual veil of dimness descend into
the person in the act of "sin" which is not about
morality. Christianity has screwed up so many words
that it is hard to talk. I mean, I won't go there,
but I could soap box for hours.
What I was trying to say is the whole notion of Karma
and watching what is coming to you and trying to make
all the ducks line up in a row is some form of
control. The need to control comes from a lack of
faith, no foundation within the soul.
It isn't surrender. It is attachment, as Mystress
said so succinctly, while I ramble on. Geez. One of
these days I'll learn to edit instead of stream of
consciousness.....maybe. :)
So in making a short story long, I think all of this
effort trying to make your life fit these rules of
what goes out comes back is a trap, as it assumes you
understand the time frame you are dealing with. It is
a false infrastructure that is a crutch.
So, you said, it could be another lifetime. I like
that you said that as it shows you are expanding your
boundaries of your understanding of who you
are....that you transcend time.
Time is an artificial construct. For me, I swim
inside and out of it. I don't live linear time, and
it doesn't matter if this is believed or not. I'm
just stating that Time is a limitation built on an
infrastructure that you as a soul proceed, in reality.
I am sorry if I have said too much as in all honesty,
I cannot keep up with all the mail here and I've only
been on this list for a little while and some of you
know me but I'm mostly just lurking in here and there,
but I loved what Mystress said and i really wanted to
put out there the possibility that karma, whether true
or false is not the point here.
It is, all I can see as beneficial about karma is
learning that harm to others is harm to you, so in
that sense, you can begin to see, we are all you. We
are a web of lights, be it match or pillar of fire or
collapsing stars, it makes no difference. Big or
small, there is no
better or lesser in truth. It appears that way, in
time, in the finiteness of transient beings, but
outside of that, you can pull up and see that the
smallest is as valuable in the tapestry as the largest
and we are really just thinking about protecting
ourselves and our interest when we talk of karma for the
most part. It is what is in it for me, what
consequence do I pay.
Of coarse, this is natural, as that is the eye of the
ego and the lens it has stems from the "me" self, but
there is a place where you see the WE SELF as the
pivotal point. And the irony is that you can only get
there by throwing away all the societal niceties and
start putting yourself first. Once you do that, you
realize that helping yourself is helping others. A
healthy you is a gift to those around you whether they
see it or not. We are so used to gifts being seen
and we want them to be acknowledged in our internal
registers....but all these stages are okay.
Pepper, my little diatribe here was more to articulate
things for myself than to point this out to you. I am
not a teacher. And I am a teacher. I am not a
student and I am. Go through all polarities and
embrace them, fully, and do it through the core of you
and then you transcend duality and another world is
possible right here, right now, for all of us.
this is just a steph ramble, some of you are used to
them. :) sometimes I just feel like sharing, like
something opens up and I want to convey the essence of
something...............and it may not be words that
do it. Sometimes, I just feel that open window of
potential, a possibility of something so
"pluripotential" that I just have to say something,
for I love, and love gives whether comfortable or not,
especially when it is uncomfortable, to give.
I've been fortunate enough to have received such
magnificent love in my love............love totally
undeserved, and that was what is beautiful about it.
Love without chains. It comes only when you are
unattached. Mystress, she helped me through illness
and blocks and I was a real jerk but she gave not
expecting to recieve, and I don't believe she did it
because of karma. That would be motivated by her
gain. I think she did it out of the unconditional
wellspring within, for she is Sourced in Love.
That is one example, and love without need is the
most beautiful thing. When you don't need from
someone but you desire out of wholeness, not because
you are counting karma for future gain, but out of the
peace of your Eternal NOW. I live there,, and it is
disruptive. Love is disruptive, pure unadulterated
love, it is disruptive. Not because it is bad, but
because, we are so used to dimness that when the light
shines it hurts our eyes and we attack, shield run or
lash out......we prefer shadows and ghosts.
I just know that is okay too, but it is more whole if
you consciously choose shadow, not if you are there
because that is the only world you know.
And I learned one lesson so long ago you wouldn't
believe me if I told you, but I learned, in the end,
there is no blame.
Just consider, or not. Whatever is resonant for you.
I just waned to give options for those who wanted
them. Of course, there are plenty others.....no
judgement, no blame. All this guilt we weigh
ourselves down with is our own. Guilt I think is an
excuse we use to slow down the growth for while and
hide. Confusion I believe is strategic and calculated
obfuscation, for at some level, some level, knows, and
is choosing it.
It isn't wrong to choose it. Sometimes it is a damn
good buffer when you need to take five. Nothing
wrong with that.
Steph, finally getting off the soap box
>
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