To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/03/17 04:27
Subject: Fw: [K-list] Re: Fiona's Mother - among other things
From: =?Windows-1252?B?Sm9z6Q==?=

Just wanted to put it on the list too. Sorry for my ego.

> Dear Wim,
>
> Thanks for your comment. I don't know Cat's off-line suggestion to Fiona,
> - but I will let her go.
> Writing once about everything that happened in the last few months, helps
> doing that.
> It's my anger, that cannot be directed at her anymore - but should not
hurt
> me any longer as well.
>
> It's the same frustration that haunted me for so long regarding my mother:
> she died having been unhappy for a very long time. Doesn't a child want
her
> mother to be happy? She did not get the chance in that life anymore. It's
so
> hard to let go of not being able to have made her happy, and now go for my
> own happiness.
> It's guilt for my lack of power to do something about it, and shame for
> being me.
> I want people to be happy. I wished Marianne to be happy before she
stepped
> out of life, but she couldn't. I hope she is now.
>
> I practice, but to be honest I do'nt know what I am practicing anymore. I
> just try to be, trust my feelings more and more and look at my thoughts
when
> I suspect them to be unforgiving/judging/distrusting.
> Is that OK you think? I'm still growing up you know..........
>
> José
>
> > Dear José,
> >
> > Only a short reply, leave her be.
> > If she'd dead, then she'd dead.
> >
> > Tell her for once that she will not get her way, no way and never, and
now
> > off with her. Do not come back anymore... Kill that engrammatic ego of
> > hers... You are not hurting her as your hurt is that she kept trying to
> hurt
> > you.
> >
> > Iemand die dood is moet dood blijven.
> >
> > Cat may have the right suggestion for you. She commented off line about
> > Fiona and she had it right on....
> >
> > Love Wim
> >
> > PS.
> > Oh my dear José why do we need to suffer any longer?
> > I was able to decide to give it up, why is that so hard, so hard....
> > Voordat we vrij kunnen zijn hebben we eerst nog een appeltje te
schillen,
> > als we dat nou eens konden laten zitten... Wanneer we dat doen is er
> ineens
> > vrijheid. Moet dan nog wel op je 'qui vive' zijn,
> > You have to practice doing it...
> >
> >
>

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