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To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/01/31 08:44
Subject: [K-list] A Dilemma
From: Jb789

On 2001/01/31 08:44, Jb789 posted thus to the K-list:

Hi,

...something 'weighing heavily', at this moment.
What is a dilemma/confusion ?

At present, the mind drains quite a bit of energy, trying to decide
whether to move in with my female partner, or not.
(.. 'funny' that I should be involved in this activity, at my not-
exactly young age..)
It is using the for/against-reasons model and the greatest fear-
factor is that it might be an impediment to the 'work'; at the same
time, something tells me that that's nonsense.. and yet another
thought says "but what about the 'toxic states' you get into due to
being presented with her incessant mental/emotional busyness", and
yet another say :".. but she is very loving.." and so on.
And at times I feel that all these are arisings in a dream-world, and
they present no real impediment for the work, regardless of the
choice made.

The fact is that I feel much more 'whole' and with a sharper
clarity/sensitivity of perception/awareness, when I am alone for some
days, than when in her company.
But should this be a valid reason to avoid relationship ?
 
I would appreciate your furthering the enquiry into this, with your
eventual pointers/sharing.
Have a good day,
JB



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