To: K-list
Recieved: 2001/01/25 17:37
Subject: Re: [K-list] to Angelique
From: Carol C.
On 2001/01/25 17:37, Carol C. posted thus to the K-list:
----- Original Message -----
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent <MystressATnospamKundalini-Gateway.org>
To: Carol C. <britcarATnospamtbaytel.net>; <Kundalini-GatewayATnospamegroups.com>
Sent: Tuesday, January 23, 2001 11:28 PM
Subject: Re: [K-list]
> At 03:13 PM 1/22/01, Carol C. wrote:
> >Sorry for getting carried away about the Jesus issue! It just seemed to
> >snowball.
> >
> >Blessings and love! Carol
>
> Well, no worries, you were not the only one! Takes 2 to tango...
>
> My detachment is not always so perfect as I would like it to be,
> either.. The beauty of community, to be here for each other thru the hugs
> and the arguments, and not let the arguments get in the way of the love.
If
> we agreed all the time, there would be no discussion. We'd be Borg, not
> individuals. Borg do not argue, but they do not hug, either.. :)
> Nothing like a good fracas, to create appreciation for harmony. Stuff
> comes up on the list, regular like the tide and the phases of the moon. I
> allow it, because part of K. is the process of releasing and that process
> is not always smooth.. wishing for it to be is just more resistance.
> I teach surrender, because surrender is so essential for the path of
> K., and because I need to remind myself of it, every day. It is never so
> completely habitual that I can go without reminding myself of the value in
it.
> Lately I have been celebrating "The realization of my realization"..
> giving gratitude for the inner light that does not go out, blissful...
but
> even still, I cannot rest on my laurels. Complacency is not where it's at.
> Like they say, "when you are green, you are growing, when you're ripe,
> you're rotten". The tree that stops growing, dies.
> There's a nice fistful of cliches'. ;)
>
> So often, people write to thank me for maintaining this community, but
> truly my devotion is and always has been self centered. I feel so honored
> and blessed to have this community in my life, words cannot express the
> depth of my gratitude for you all. The list would be nothing, without the
> members.
> Heartfelt Blessings....
> **************************************************
Dear Angelique,
Thank you again. This has been a painful week of looking in the mirror at
me,
and not much liking the things seen. You are right; I can be judgmental and
intolerant of intolerance, not always, but sometimes. Most of the things you
said about me were right on. The result has been what feels like
fragmentation,
and when I look in the mirror today,there is nothing. I do not know how to
explain that.
It is a strange feeling, but somehow also a peaceful feeling. I am nothing.
When I first joined the K list it was because of feeling a need to progress,
and
not being sure what that meant, just feeling the need. I think I was
envisioning more Light,
but feel now maybe this fragmenting was necessary. You were right to poke at
me.
I needed to be hit on the head with my own dross, and you do it so well,
Angelique!
Do not take offense, because I am smiling.
Like you I do not wish to ever become complacent and will try to learn and
grow
by whatever method that takes. I have also come to feel this is a very
loving community
with members who are not afraid to look in the mirror, even when it hurts.
Now I will just be peaceful for a while and let this unfold.
Blessings and Love, Angelique
from Carol
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
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