To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/12/29 13:29
Subject: [K-list] My X-mas trip.
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2000/12/29 13:29, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
I survived X-mas.. can you believe it? LOL!! Thought I'd offer an
update, on how things went.
Not without some bumps.. some clearing stuff. I watched the eclipse
thru my Dad's welding helmet and got blessings from the Sun angel..
X-mas dinner at my sister's was peaceful, tho there was an odd moment
when my other sister shot me in the chest with a rubber band from the X-mas
crackers. I yelped and jumped with surprise.. wondering why she chose me
for her target.
I got into an interesting private conversation with my older sister
after , cleared
some stuff out of her, and cleared the air. Turned out that she does
believe I'm psychic, guess I passed her tests.. she kept trying to get me
to tell her what I could do.. I felt uncomfortable with the idea of
bragging about past miracles. I had to explain to her that what I can do at
any given moment is dependent on Goddess Will for me. She had not read the
email I sent.. and thinks that was perfection, that she did not read it
until after we had talked. OK.. the important thing for me, was sending it.
Later that night when everyone had gone to bed, I got to talking to Mom,
she was telling me stories of when she was single and her best friend died.
I know that telling someone about events is the same as giving them the
karma of it so I opened to receiving. She made some unkind comments about
my sexual orientation because my older brother, whom I have not spoken to
in years, showed them the pic on my website of me hugging druid when he is
only wearing a harness.. she described it as "horrible" and I had quite
some things to say about what is "horrible". After she went to bed I could
not sleep, ended up crying my eyes out till 5 am, remembering my awful
childhood and overwhelmed by too much energy, too much karma.. My stuff,
Mom's stuff and my sister's stuff and eclipse and all.. very messy.
My oldest sister came over to my folks house the evening of Boxing
day. I did a bunch of healing and clearing work on her, teaching her how
to surrender her stuff and get grounded.... so, those issues seem to be
resolved. Thank Goddess! She called me the next night and asked me to call
her on it, the next time she gets verbally abusive.. yaaaaaaay!
She has been doing a lot of work with some psychics who channel
spirits and guides, sorting out the puzzles of some 18 year old predictions
that she is mentioned in. That is her path, her process and I tried to be
respectful of it .. but I felt the need to explain that I teach my students
that any spirit that offers predictions of the future and scary warnings,
like she is receiving, is not a worthy guide, and she needs to check
resonance with her own heart, and not bet the farm on what the spirits say.
The next day I attempted to explain to my Mom about why I had such a
horrible childhood, at first she freaked out all defensive trying to make
me feel guilty for upsetting her. No dice. Eventually I think she
understood that I was not blaming her, I just needed to be heard.
Actually, I'm still not sure she understands, but I was able to explain
that it was because she freaks out and gets defensive and tries to make her
kids feel guilty for even having problems, whenever we tried to talk to
her, is why I gave up asking for her help when I was very young. Thus, my
childhood was very hard because I was so alone trying to handle everything
myself.
druid tried to speak to my parents on my behalf while I was still
sleeping the next morning.. they kept saying, "why doesn't she just forget
about all that stuff?" They don't understand, I cannot forget.. I wish I
could.. forgetting is not healing.
I'm so glad druid was with me.. he was a rock of support, and I needed
hugs, often.
Yesterday morning I spent about an hour doing some healing and clearing
work on my Dad.. it was nice because this time he could feel the energy
moving, heat, vibrations, the Grail heartbeat moving around in his body.
When I was done he felt much better, and I was so weak I could barely pull
my boots on..
Nevertheless, I spent quite some time that afternoon doing healing work
on my Mom. Then I was truly exhausted, flew home last night and went to
bed.. slept for 10 hours and I'm still tired this morning. I'm going to
need to spend some time clearing more stuff out of myself that my empathy
picked up from the family. I don't mind, it is good to be able to help..
but it is so very tiring.
Strange.. last night I want to bed still wearing a necklace of pink
coral beads .. pink coral has some protective qualities against negative
energy. I don't usually use stuff like that but there are exceptions. This
morning about a dozen of the beads that had been at the back of my neck
while I slept, were shattered into crumbs.. wondering, what that was about..
So, overall, the trip was a good one because some things got resolved,
but it was very hard and tiring. I hardly slept at all while I was there..
and I know there will be some fallout still to come. My Mom is still mad at
me, I think, because I dared to say that my childhood was horrible and she
will go complaining to my older brother about it and he is not my friend..
c'est la vie.. she felt my love, thru my healing, so the rest will be as
Goddess Wills..
Thankyou, everyone for your support. I hope you had happy holidays!
Blessings...
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