To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/12/17 12:35
Subject: Re: [K-list] Re: empathy...
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2000/12/17 12:35, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
At 02:10 AM 12/17/00, divine_goddessATnospamhotmail.com wrote:
>--- In Kundalini-GatewayATnospamegroups.com, Mystress Angelique Serpent
>
>Ahhhhh Angelique, where would would be today without the crucible of
>learning made by our families....
Yes.. I try to find the gratitude that heals.. but these past few
months wrestling with these issues.. it just hurts.
>I sympathize, I empathize, and I cry because I have your family in my
>family.
I love you, Susan.. thank you for your caring heart.
>My mother could make the most hardened dominatrix run to a corner and
>wail... and I am going home for Christmas too....she is a powerful
>woman.
>
>I dread and love it at the same time. My mother and family are so
>excited for me coming. I have not been home for seven years. If I had
>never left I probably would have gone psychotic. My kahuna mentor
>told me that when he went to help families it was the crazy one who
>was the barometer of the sanity in the family soul. It spoke of hidden
>secrets and dysfuntion.
Oy.. my family thinks I am crazy.. I really don't mind, I agree with
them.. I only wish they were wise enough to be gentle with the crazy woman.
>Showing them compassion sometimes wore me out. Compassion is a
>discipline to be practiced! Sheesh, it can be real hard. What can be
>done is turn down the volume. I found, it is easier to be with
>people, if the volume is so low I can only make out the words and not
>feel the sound of violence in their voices.
I wish.. but they do not have to speak aloud, their thoughts and
feelings shout so loud...
>I know this doesnt always help with the empathy of the feelings
>coming thru but it does help me deal with that better. It is
>important for me to realize....again... that all is energy and anger
>and sarcasm directed toward me is just that, a flow of energy. If I
>resist the flow to protect myself it gets pretty painful. Instead, I
>don't resist and I can feel the energy flow over and thru me like a
>heat wave and pass on to the other side. Because I do not resist, the
>momentum of their energy goes flying forward and sometimes they fall
>on their face because their is nothing to receive it and bounce it
>back to them to hold them and strengthen them in their position.
>
>I call it verbal Aikido, sort of like a Tongue Fu :D
Yes.. I know what you mean, Karmic Vampire Games and Psychic judo,
grab onto the fist that punches and pull.. but my inner child .. she
resists like she has always resisted. Perhaps it is so hard for me this
year because of the lost 9 year old splinter I retrieved from where she was
lost in the Mansion dream all these years.. There was a promise of hope
that I/she clung to, knowing my future.. that one day I would be all grown
up and free.. but instead I feel trapped by the chains of memory. Still
seeking to be free... looking for freedom inside of myself but it seems
that I will not be free till they are freed also..
>As you and I have discussed privately before, this principle of non
>resistance is how I deal with entity attacks. Give them what they
>most desire at the most basic...love. Do it in spirit if it is too
>painful to do it in person. Write letters to their guardian spirits.
>They do have them too, lol, and ask for assistance and tell them how
>you feel.
I have been doing that, for months.. every day I speak to my sister's
higher self.. because I cannot speak to her physical self. Giving layers of
forgiveness and love and hoping Dear Goddess! that the message comes thru.
So last night I sent the post to my sister.. and this morning,
remembering on awakening I curled up in a trembling ball wondering what my
inbox would hold. I have finally spoken, able to express myself with out
anger because I was not writing to her directly. Now I wait for the other
shoe to drop, for her response.. waiting to see if the axe will fall or if
I dare to hope she will understand. It is all forgiven, but it cannot
continue..
>You will be in my prayers, love.
>
>Susan
and you in mine.. soul sister, can we be strong for each other, if not
for ourselves?
Blessings.....
1/9698/0/_/680797/_/977092214/
---------------------------------------------------------------------_->
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org
DISCLAIMER!
Home | Archive Index | Search the archives | Subscribe
K. List FAQ | Kundalini FAQs | Signs and Symptoms | Awakening Experiences | K. list Polls | Member Essays | Meditations | List Topics | Art Gallery | Cybrary | Sitemap | Email the moderators.
symbol.