To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/12/13 09:48
Subject: [K-list] One day with/as the Eternal, then ...
From: J B
On 2000/12/13 09:48, J B posted thus to the K-list:
Hi,
Since the following sharing, does not include any traditional
kundalini symptoms (as far as I understand), it might not be of
immediate interest,.. but then it might.
If you can relate to it, I would welcome your sharing/comments.
I have chosen the words as carefully as I possibly could; they are
factual in spite of their apparently
'impressive' overtones or resemblance to others' verbal pointers
concerning Truth or another dimension.
Many years ago, (when I got interested in J. Krishnamurti's
teachings), I was walking down the street
in a quiet area of the town; the gardens were green and there was
sunshine;
a certain awareness and sensitivity was there;
suddenly, while as if new 'antennas' were opening up
the presence of the Obviously! Eternal, was there.
It was obviously so (Eternal), independent of the word.
The word 'eternal', was _not_ an outcome of conclusive
reasoning/evaluation,..like when you look
at the skies and think "this universe must be infinite and must've
always been here"
and then see it according to the conceptual conclusion.
But it was rather, like when you taste honey for example,.. the word
(sweet/eternal in this context)
comes later, for the sake of verbal communication.
However, the mind could exclaim with wonder :
"..Goodness me,.. there _Is_ something that corresponds to the
word 'eternal' ! "
The body, was like a fish in this Ocean of multi-directional
energy,..
Indestructible, Immense Space,
It contained every thing/sound/being; Self-sustained, dependant on
nothing;
'my' Identity was That and therefore no fear;
I was not being 'high', but was as supreme Sobriety.
It was _not_ an 'experience'..
(that day, was the only time I saw, what J. Krishnamurti meant with
the mind-boggling statement (I paraphrase).
'you cannot _experience_ Truth'.)
It was not a momentary flash of 'insight' or psychedelic/etherial
lights
or a psycho-somatic/energetic-merely-personal intensity;
it was there the whole day.
'I' felt like a baby, learning to crawl/walk.
My 'identity' could move from being responsible as a body/'person',
soberly relating to another..
(much more sober/sane/factual than in the 'normal' state)..
to being that endless Expanse of Living Space.
For a moment a fearful thought arose : 'Jeez..what if It will
disappear..?!'.
The answer was instantaneous..: it was Obvious,
that It has always been here and It will always be here .. and
everywhere,
regardless of whether the perception of it closed its doors, or not.
Following day: 'gone';
since it was obvious that It was Not the Result/Creation of an
ambitious techniques-meditating ego
with its effort, and seen that It had absolutely nothing to do
with 'me'..
there was no regret/despair upon Its 'ending'.
The 'me', naturally confessed to its 'impotence' in the face of this
Immensity,
and 'prostrated' (non-emotionally, but as a matter of Fact) before
It.
Yes, It was a rare jewel, the only Eternal jewel, unending Life
itself..
perhaps it was a gift, ..
...and yet, at times I wonder :
-what- was the point/significance of a 1 day in/as Eternity and then
its 'disappearance' ?!..
Perhaps a wrong question.
Anything of lasting value in this event ?
Perhaps, perhaps none.
As for its re-'appearance', as far as I understand/know, the mere
Memory of it,
and efforts motivated by it, can never be used to re-discover/produce
it.
The event cannot be used.
And yet, there It Was !
But, since 'I' am now back, I cannot prevent an occasional thought
saying:
"this interest that you have in self-knowing,
in spite of its being the most risky game there is, with odds at
most/least : 1 to Infinity…
based on the Evidence presented to you,
one can easily say that, it makes it the only 'game' worth
playing !".
The question might be : "But then, is This remembrance your motive,
for being interested
in knowing yourself ?"
I would say 'no'. It is something along the lines of what J.
Krishnamurti said once:
(I do not have the correct quotation, so I paraphrase)
'the man who is really interested and approaches life simply, says :
..for god's sake, here I am.. –suffering- !..
-Is there- another way to live ?!'
Joseph.
1/9699/0/_/680797/_/976726161/
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