To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/11/14 15:12
Subject: Re: [K-list] Lots of Questions - As my story will tell...
From: Michaelf55
On 2000/11/14 15:12, Michaelf55 posted thus to the K-list:
Hi,
Kristi Marie, I too see the "star shines" and have that ringing, churning
sound in my ears, and a feeling of something trying to come through. It's
there all the time, become so normal I don't notice it all the time.
Sometimes it intensifies, or another higher-pitched, stronger tone comes in
over it and can last for several seconds, sometimes accompanied by this small
blue sphere/star that appears etherically before me. It seems to increase
when I am more balanced or "in tune", like I touch into this energy field
that seems to bring some sort of balance. I have resisted this, consciously
and unconsciously for a long time. I find ways to distract myself from it. My
feeling is that these energies/entities may be e.t.s, but I don't know.
Whatever it is it is intelligence, some would say they are guides, helpers,
whatever...
I also hear very accutely and am very sensitive to sound. I have this "off"
feeling on the entire left-side of my body, like a sensitivity, a feeling of
being out of balance between left and right. A few times I've experienced
after falling asleep this energy entering my crown and going down the left
side of my body; it is a heaviness and I sort of contract that side when it
happens. It feels like something is trying to go through, or clear out. I've
had many other kundalini-related things happen since I was 19, but until
recently I just thought it was all just generalized anxiety and stress, but
it seems clearer to me now that it is a kundalini thing.
I also have this very heavy feelign in my tail bone/root chakra, especially
when I'm sitting still, and the whole region down there gets tingly and numb.
I also get teh crown tinglies, and interestingly I get this vibrating at
point on my face, especially on the left side just under my eye and behind
the ear. Somtimes I wake up with a strobe-light effect in my third eye. Also,
pressure in head. Neck tension. Abdominal distension (issues). Generalized
itchy feeling. Heat not in my body but on the surface, often on calves.
Something going on in chest/thymus area. Sometimes spinning sensation in
belly, when lying down (like when you stand and spin around). Vision, not
blurred, but not as clear as it should be. A feeling of mental confusion, yet
at the same time I can think better intellectually than ever. No loss of
sexual desire, but a loss of vitality down there, like the energy isn't
flowing as well. Easy access to altered states of consciousness, but a fear
of doing so which keeps me from going too deeply into it. Socially I am dead.
It feels weird relating to other people. Life also seems unreal. Alternating
despair and excitement. Overly sensitive to others' vibes.
Lots of questions too. Wary of delusions (I've been through the "I'm here to
ascend the earth" thing - seems too much like fantasy now to me, although I
don't doubt some refining process is going on here - earth changes or
ascension or whatever you want to call it). I'm pretty sure at the "end" of
this all is the "emptiness", and this is all a clearing out, a house-cleaning
so to speak.
>enlightenment is not a form of being nor is it being formless.
I think that is true.
>What we might like to consider is how sick people try to heal others the
mentally >deluded advise others on illusion and so on
That's what I'm wary of. And it seems that mostly that's all that goes on,
especially with the guru stuff, with some rare exceptions.
Well that's my stuff...
Michael
1/9699/2/_/680797/_/974239997/
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