To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/08/17 13:51
Subject: [K-list] K Pills and Cheap Thrills
From: Paul Perner
On 2000/08/17 13:51, Paul Perner posted thus to the K-list:
David Bozzi wrote:
>
> Hi there. Although some researchers speculate that *heavy* and *continual* use of
> MDMA *may* accelerate the usual serotonin decline that occurs with aging this actually hasn't been
> proven. The neural & hormonal damage caused by long-term use of SSRIs is however well documented.
>
> Overall, I agree with the many researchers, therapists, counselors, users, etc., who find that
> the correct use of MDMA under the right circumstances can be an extremely effective catalyst in
> dissolving blocks and helping people get into the heart chakra to experience empathy. (with themselves
> & others)
>
> David
> (only tried it once 11 years ago)
>
If you will forgive me David, I'm going to take your statement a
little out of context (bipolar treatment) to stress a few points. Mind
you, I'm not a doctor (I can only speak from experience and through a
Californian's perspective).
I've also tried MDMA once about ten years ago. This was when the rave
scene was just gaining momentum. Out here they were sometimes called
"big bangs" in those days... seething masses of youth pushing the limits
of all things audio, visual, erotic and exotic. When I took ex at one of
these events, I was initially impressed, but then I thought, "Wait a
minute, this all seems so familiar."
Like some others on this list, I spent a goodly portion of youth ('69
to '74) soaring on LSD, mushrooms, mescaline etc., drifting in and out
of parties and huge gatherings with loud music and colorful visuals. At
times we would feel tremendous empathy with others... the world... the
cosmos... We would go on journeys beyond the reach of language and art.
"But the rave scene is different. You don't understand," a young voice
might argue from this list.
I do understand, my friend.
Through the years I've taken the altered state to the extreme. I quit
all drugs in college and pursued various religions and mystisisms like
everybody else. I even got down and wholeheartedly flung myself into the
invocations of Christianity... another altered state, only without the
external chemicals. Later, I found a much more rewarding life as an
artist - - - of sorts.
In the 80's, as some of you know, my brief, but rewarding stint as a
rock music journalist ended the day I tried heroin. Here we go again.
For the next fourteen years I tried every pharmaceutical and treatment
I could get my hands on to get off the stuff. I even gave religion the
old college try again. It was all more or less a temporary band-aid.
Useful at times, but not getting to the core.
As I've said in earlier posts, what worked for me was the following:
At the end of a trail of burnt bridges I experience a cold turkey more
severe than any before it. I thought I was going to die. My emotions, my
body, my brian... everything was reacting to what *not* there. The shock
of the void.
All physical comfort, mental reasoning, love, hope - the whole package
was gone.
I survived, got healthy, got out of myself and started helping others.
In a couple months the strange dreams started.
On the 23rd of March, 1998 the sky blew open.
A sudden new reality and it's subsequent growing pains brought me to
this list.
My point:
Hallucinogens, entheogens, empathegens, drugs, religion and other
catalysts, external and otherwise, have there dangers, blessings, there
places and there times. But they only go so far.
There's a huge difference between *feeling* spiritual and actually
becoming a part of a greater eternal spiritual process.
We can create marvelous bubbles around our heads and fill them with
all the latest words, sounds, substances, theories and mystical
maintenance methods this dimension has to offer. But bubbles burst as
bubbles will.
What if the plug was pulled on our little civilization?
Suddenly all we were left with was food and water, the earth and sky,
the here and the now (oh no! gasp!). Perhaps Goddess would smile as
people scurried about to find wood, build shelters and try to sort the
whole thing out again.
And perhaps some of us could join hands and run laughing like
children, as naked as Eden down to the ocean.
Night falls and the moon rises.
The waves gently kiss our bodies.
We send our energy up to stars and galaxies.
...if only for one sweet moment of emergence.
>>>>>>>*<<<<<<<
Was it all just a dream?
It's a warm summer afternoon. As I close my eyes and drift off again,
my kaleidoscope slips from my lap, rolls across the flour and stops at
your feet.
Paul
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