To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/05/18 21:02
Subject: Re: [K-list] P.S....:-)
From: Mystress Angelique Serpent
On 2000/05/18 21:02, Mystress Angelique Serpent posted thus to the K-list:
At 12:56 AM 5/19/00 +0200, Ben Holland wrote:
>
>I have absolutly no idea what the answer to my question was. If I did,
>why would I even bother my time asking it.
You have been playing a number of games, why waste your time with that??
>Having speant time looking through the archieves of this site I was
>hoping to find people who may actually be nice.
Veiled power games, manipulative stuff that you don't even realize you
are sending, but the vibe that comes thru reading the energy of your posts,
is not nice, Ben.
You do word games writing stuff backwards to see who is "clever enough"
to understand you, then you ignore the polarity of your own statements..
The crystal clear polarity of what you just said, is "boo hoo, the list
members are a bunch of meanies in a mean world who disappoint me like
always." Childish!
Victim crap, made worse by your refusal to see that you have created the
environment you find yourself in.
What you put out comes back multiplied, and that is what you are
experiencing. Several folks have been trying to explain to you, that they
read by touch. Not the words, but the vibrations behind them. We react to
the vibrations, and you feel misunderstood.. not so, you cannot see the
forest for the trees, but we are grokking the totality of the infomation
you present. The statements, the polarity of meaning in the statements, and
the emotional energy and behavior patterns behind them.
We are not attacking you, Ben, we are attacking your behavior. Your
karmic patterns. We poke them, to bring them up so you can see them and let
them go. We cannot help, but see them, you are showing more of your
patterns, than you can see yourself.
The attitude you take, is your own choice. You can insist that you are
the victim of the mean listmembers, or you can decide that this is a
different form of love than you have encountered, before.
> I have no idea
>why the personal attacks persist or a reason why.
OK, I'll explain it to you. They are a reflection of projections that
you are not aware you are sending out.
For example: the age question. You had a belief that some questions
are inevitable. You projected that belief onto the list, pigeonholed us as
being shallow people who would judge by linearity of experience, then
tried to short circut your own loop by answering in advance.
What you really told us, is that you really don't see us as individual
manifestations of divinity. Your expectations of being judged, created the
reality of the judgments you are presently experiencing.
You created this, and now you try to hide from your results with
accusations and confusion. That is not the path of empowerment, and you
know it isn't.. so why are you doing it? Because it is your pattern to
*react* in that way.
On a verbal level, your age statement is not a personal attack, but on
an energy level, it is. It's a negative judgment that you aimed at the
whole list, without even realizing.
You tried to fit the community into a shoe that does not fit, without
taking the time to get to know us, first, for who we are. You put us into a
pigeonhole while trying to out smart a loop that is wholly your own.
This is typical power chakra stuff.. by trying to control: telling
your age before we "inevitably" asked, you ended up creating the opposite
result. You made it an issue, and we responded asking why it is such an
issue to you? Not looking at the age itself, but rather why is it
important to you?
Try reading your posts as if they were written by somebody else. Try
reading the energy of them, and not just the words.
Try reading the energy of
>The memory of the dream, about reading the book, comes after reading the
>book.
>
>THINK ABOUT THIS REALLY REALLY CAREFULLY
>
>FOCUS.
.. and you will understand the list's resistance to having a newbie try
to tell them what to do. You are talking down to people, it is a passive
aggressive power game and it got old real quick.
Do you really think we are too stupid to know when to think and what to
focus on? That is what is projected by that post. The polarity of thinking
you need to tell us to think, in big capital letters, is your assumption
that we are too stupid to do so, if we are not told by you that it is
important.
Don't you think it is kind of silly to be playing games of writing
sentences backwards, but not bothering to read the reverse polarity of your
own statements? Especially if you have already realized that all you can
see is yourself reflected...
Passive aggression. You are insulting people, using "nice" words, and
you cry victim when they object to it, and reflect it back to you.
Many of the folks you are writing to, already know that *thinking* is a
highly over rated intellectual vanity, feeling is a wiser sense, so
telling them to THINK ABOUT THIS REALLY REALLY CAREFULLY is really
insulting to our intuitive intelligence.
Do you want me to go thru all of your posts and point out where you are
playing power/status games with the listmembers?
I could, the many varieties of human status transactions and power
games, assertive and passive, are my specialty.
I'd really rather not.. I know you are intelligent enough to understand
my meaning from a few examples, if you get out of your "victim" attitude
long enough to realize nobody is attacking you.
I see God in you very clearly, your Divine perfection, and I also see
the behaviors that you cannot see, due to the "forest for the trees" effect
of ego, and I speak out in compassion for you, because I know getting the
reactions you do and not understanding why, causes you pain.
You already know that your beliefs create your reality, and what you
put out comes back multiplied, but you have not integrated those beliefs
enough to apply them to the list members behavior. To take responsibility
for the results you have created, in how people react to you.
We are not attacking you, Ben. We are attacking the karma that makes you
behave in ways that get the negative reactions that confuse you and cause
you pain. We are attacking the unconscious passive agressive power games
that are such an automatic part of your personality you are not even aware
of them, and so you are puzzled by the responses you get.
Good heavens, that long post I wrote about the age question, was in
response to PAIN I could feel in you, about the inevitability of being
pigeonholed by linear judgments of age. It hurts so much that you wanted to
get it over with quick, like ripping off a band-aid. You did not say that
in words, but the feelings came thru, crystal clear. Volumes of
information, of all the times people judged you and it hurt, and you
wondering what you said to get such a reaction?
There are a lot of enlightened people on this list. A herd of psychic
intuitives that read your emotions and blockages more readily than your
scientific analyses... and respond to that, not to your words.
You speak in words, we see energy patterns of behavior that are Karma,
and that is what we respond to. We are reading between the lines, of what
is said and what is unsaid and what is the reverse writing of what was
said.. and responding to the totality of it. Don't be so quick on the
defensive, seeking to persuade us that we are mistaken, until you have
taken the time to look within yourself, and ask your inner guidance whether
we are right.
> If I was to say
>something very nasty or to say something very rude or simply
>plainly hateful, then I would understand such givings. If I was to send
>each of you hate mail and then to post misinformation on the web
>about you, then yes I could understand such givings.
You are being rude, in your presumptions and projections. You are
being hateful, in your refusal to see the value in our perceptions. You are
being nasty, in accusing us of abuse and invaldating the perceptions and
opinions of those who respond to you.
There is an ordinary level of politeness, that passes for sleepers,
unawakened folks.. there the rule is "if you cannot say something nice,
don't say anything at all".. that rule doesn't work, around telepaths,
where thoughts and feelings speak louder than words.
If you get out of your defensive shell for a moment, you will realize
that while my words may sound nasty, the energy of this post is COMPASSION.
>in some form of absolutly useless and mundane
>approach to the 'I know more than you do...nah...nah...nah.....nah.
>.nah ...nah..' This is completly useless to me and to anyone else. I can not
>do anything with that kind of conversation. No one can do anything with that
>kind of conversation. That kind of conversation has nothing to do with
>anything
>that I have been saying at all. Nothing. Not a single thing. I cam nowhere
>near that.
Methinks, thou dost protest too much..
HERE IS AN EXAMPLE OF YOUR SAYING THAT:
>I stand by this point so firmly you would not believe. Because
>if I failed to point out at every possible turn that these are not
>psychological things then the process of awakening, enlightenment
>can not be achieved. They must be psychological.
Read between the lines, sweetie. You have just told us all that you
know the path to enlightenment better than anyone, and we cannot become
enlightened unless we listen to you and agree with your paradigms. Guess
what, plenty of people have become enlightened, who don't even have a word
for Chakras.. let alone, any need to understand their nature.
David Koresh, yes indeedy.. you are saying that you have to preach your
propaganda at us "at every turn" because otherwise we won't be "saved". We
will fail to become enlightened unless we buy what you are selling.
What a big bollocks hero trip!!! What an utterly patronizing and
offensive attitude!
>On the other groups what I say in responces to e-mails does not get
>missunderstood.
There is another power game.. comparing this list to another, unknown
list so as to judge this one unfavorably. "Or, Nyah nyah, they know more
then you do!" Childish.
>I ask questions to stimulate a responce that I can find refreshing to use.
Uh-uh. You do an "interrogator" power game. You ask questions to
"test" listmembers, and get responses that you can shred and nullify, to
reassure yourself of your righteousness. You ask questions to play a high
status "teacher" game, and give yourself an opening for preaching and
teaching..
Like the lovely 16K post that started with:
> I hope you understand that 'discrimination' is of prime important in the
>processes of
> understanding/mediating and practicing Tantric/Sanskrit knowledge.
Bloody fucking Hell, a list full of awakened people, and you are
thinking we need to be taught the importance of discrimination??? It is our
facility with discrimination, that gives your emails such a sour taste!!!
Then you went on to offer "excercises" and refer to the list as a
"class".
Your message is very clear. You have decided that this list is a class,
and you are it's teacher. You have decided to place yourself at the top of
the hierarchy of knowledge.. that is a rather arrogant power play that
shows huge disrespect for the list. Now you cry victim and wonder why
people have started poking at you, to knock you off your pedestal.. Duh!
You have not learned enough discrimination to read the duality of your
own comments, and yet you want to teach us?? It's absurd. At the end of
your post you comment that you are not enlightened.. but you have just
directed 16k of preaching and teaching at Wim, who IS enlightened!!!
When you took on the role of "Teacher", you projected onto us the role
of "ignorant students". It's a power game.
I am not your student, and I object to your deciding I am, when I have
not asked for that. It is very rude, patronizing behavior, and it does not
make it any better if you are "nice" about it. It only makes it more
patronizing.
>Some people have said - Ben, this is a group that discuss experiances
>and nothing else. Can I please say, that this is what I have been doing.
>I am sure that these people have some of the posts.
Nope, I don't get that from your posts. You describe what you have
learned from your experiences, and you frame it as the "one and only"
TRUTH.. but the personal tone of your experiences is absent, for the most
part.. with the exception of this post, where you are expressing emotional
qualities.
>>If you want to start your own cult, I'd say, go for it.
> Obviously the humour
>of the post I sent out was not seen to be humour at all.
Of course I knew you were joking, but your joke was not funny.. not in
the context of your preachy behavior.
Anyhow, I already have my own cult, and it has it's own list, (not
this one) so you complelely missed the humor of my recommendation. :)
>Why does anyone
>even bother to give information out here.
Oy, you spam the list to death with off-topic preaching, then whine
like a jewish mother that we don't kiss your feet for it in undying
graitude for your generosity.
>...why bother when it is turned on
>the person.
Well, of course it is! Your perceptions are a reflection of who you
are! Your cherished beliefs make up the structure of your ego. Your
statements of the universe are seen as statements about how you see the
unverse, they are not truly the absolutes that you try to persuade us they
are.
What you say is all about who you are, and is read as such.
> I have given out several private pieces of information about myself
>that
>we used against me in a form of attack. What is going on if one can not
>state
>personal things in a KUNDALINI group of all given places......
LOL!! there goes the passive-agressive power game manipulation again..
Between the lines: we are bad people because we do not live up to your
cherished ideals of how Kundalites *should* behave, in your judgment.
Judgment is quite the sword to wield, eh??
What you do not consider, is the flaw in your judging the comments as
an attack.. the sword of judgment is double-edged.
Complaining about attack suggests you are the victim.. which is another
form of power game, called "poor me".. vampiric solicitations of sympathy,
with passive agressive accusations of harm.
>>>My lord God, who is comparing me to this man with only about fifteen
>of my own posts been sent out.
I am comparing you. He is an extreme example of the kind of power chakra
symptoms you are displaying.
You have sent 48 posts to the list, in less than one week. Among those
48 posts includes a 51 K. essay on your view of the nature of reality,
several types of word games, and a fair bit of the "I know better than you
do" preaching that you claim not to be doing.
>This kind of judgement is not game. What
>made you say the above? It is amazing how three misunderstood posts could
>lead to this. Just like a media eating frenzy.
Yes, it is a kind of feeding frenzy. Like wolves to the smell of fear.
It was first triggered, by you telling your age, because you presumed we
would be judging you by that. You projected your expectations and tried to
out wit them at the same time.. but they were all about you. Your
insecurity and self consciousness. You are projecting your assumptions
onto the list, and they are not very kind assumptions.. and so you are not
getting kindness, back.
What you are getting, is tough love. :)
>The whole point of a conversation is that things change. Having said that
>I did say that I was intrested in Free energy devices and how they could be
>manufactured FOR GOOD using our own personal experiances with
>KUNDALINI awaking, that had a number of years ago practising
>pranayama.
You want to teach discernment, but you don't look at the duality of
your own statements, or the fear behind them. Free energy, good motive..
worthy cause.. Did you ever hear the expression, "The road to Hell is paved
with Good intentions?" That's an important one for the power chakra, to
look at the polarity of your intentions, and the fear-based motives behind
them.
Good intentions are ego hero stuff, but the duality of them is the shadow
side having an excuse to play with power games. It has given you a powerful
metpahor of "free energy" which is ironic-funny for a power chakra opening.
If you had really integrated the concept of infinite free energy into your
being, you wouldn't be behaving like this.
I see your good intentions, I also see there is a whole layer of "hero"
stuff about saving the world behind it, which is based on fear that Goddess
does not have it handled.. a lack of faith.
Power chakra issues, Free will vs. Divine will, action vs. surrender.
Good intentioned motives are often fear based, and they often make a
mess. Now you have explained your motives for joining the list.. to make
"use" of our talents to further your own fear based agenda. To promote that
agenda, you tried to "educate" us.. when we were resistant to being
"educated", you switched to a "victim" song of how we were attacking you.
It never occurs to you, that people don't like being "used", any more
than they like being preached at by someone who has an agenda. That whole
power chakra package, "the end justifies the means", yadda yadda.
In the universe of the power chakra, it is how things get done, but from
a higher chakra perspective it is fear based excuses justifying power game
excesses.
Answer me one question: did you bother to read the list guidelines, and
get to know the group purpose and ettiquite, before deciding we would be
good fodder for your free energy agenda?
The purpose of this list is not for the promotion of one person's "save
the world" agenda. It is a support group for those who are undergoing the
process of Kundalini awakening, or who seek to become awakened.
You are going on about your agenda, but the list is being true to it's
purpose: a support group for awakened people. You are awakened, and your
behavior makes it obvious that you are going thru a power chakra opening..
and members are responding to that.
>It is beyond me how one arrived at a conclution that I can not use. I looked
>at
>your post on the chakras. Maybe If you had sent them on their tod, without
>the above, I may have been able to parse them with a lighter heart and
>open mind. Right now, I am feeling stuffed with your emotional battering
Sigh. More of the same. Power games, judgments and "poor me" victim
shit. Waaaaaaaaaah, you got a spanking for being rude, and now you are
gonna sulk and nurse your wounds. Poor baby!
You are taking my attacks personally. They are only personal, if you are
attached to your ego. If you have the discernment that you are trying to
TEACH, then you would be able to see past your ego-reaction to the words
and find value in the energetic cmmunication behind them.
I hate to break it to you, but I don't spend hours offering my
perceptions to people, unless I care about them. Give your head a shake,
and climb out of that pit of self pity and victimhood that you find to be
so cozy, and smell the coffee!!
>and I will have to relax for awhile before editing your post and reading the
>important stuff. Which is very important by the way.
Good! I wouldn't be spending time sharing them, if I did not think
you are worthy of the attention. Nobody here, would. I'd even bet that
those who don't think you are worthy of our love, stopped reading your
posts after about the fifth essay.
Blessings..
http://www.domin8rex.com
Vancouver, B.C., Canada.
Officially the most beautiful city in the world.
:D ;) :0 :) ;P ;) :D ;) 8D :)
I would rather live in a world where my life is surrounded by mystery
than live in a world so small that my mind could comprehend it.
~ Harry Emerson Fosdick
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