To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/05/17 14:12
Subject: Re: [K-list] re:fibro and kundalini
From: Susan Carlson
On 2000/05/17 14:12, Susan Carlson posted thus to the K-list:
Hello Andrea,
>I'm sorry, Susan. I didn't mean to imply that you had insulted her -- only
>that right now your mother doesn't appear to be in a place to hear your
>message.
Yes, my mom made that very evident the day i asked her. I have not brought
it up since. The 'scorched earth' policy is not fun.
>
>My comments didn't just come from my personal experience with fibromyalgia.
>My mother was also disabled. She had scleroderma. She died 10 years ago
>after a hard stretch of years that affected both of us very painfully.
>Looking back on things now, I wish I had been more willing to support her
>where she could accept it, as my attempts to get her to see that she was
>causing her own illness only served to alienate her from me.
>
>Your message about your mother dealt with issues I'm very familiar with and
>have had a lot of time to reflect on and heal. I do apologize if I have
>offended you. That was not my intention.
What happened between you and your mother still carries a charge that
touches others. If the charge had been totally defused, I would not have
felt the sting.
What you did say did feel cruel. That happens when extending a 'helping
hand' sometimes feels like a slap in the face. It is common new age belief
it is important to get people to own up to creating their own disease.
Nothing like heaping guilt for having the disease on top of the pain of it.
I have said things like that too. But we can forgive ourselves and do
better, can't we?
Of course, there is a better way but it takes discernment in the moment to
understand that. If I get run over by a truck I want to be taken to the
emergency room, not have a Louise Haye book, 'Heal your life' thrown at me
;)
Love, love, and more love and love some more. In a space of perfect safety
and acceptance maybe, then maybe, I can talk of it with my mother.
FWIW, my mother and I are both Registered Nurses. She has been a nurse for
over 20 years, me for 10. She and I are both expert clinicians and are well
versed in fibro physiology and symptomatic treatment. I don't know if she is
aware of the links but I will share them with her and I thank you for them.
I have taken care of patients with scleroderma, a pitiless and heart
breaking disease. To take care of someone with these diseases is a heroic
undertaking. I hope you now care for yourself with as such devotion and
attention as you gave to you mother. You deserve the rest.
Blessings,
Susan
>Blessings,
>Andrea
>
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