To: K-list
Recieved: 2000/05/14 19:06
Subject: [K-list] Chat with an Angel
From: Augustin Masquilier
On 2000/05/14 19:06, Augustin Masquilier posted thus to the K-list:
Hi Angelique!
Your letter was very helpful
Thanks for answering many of my questions. What you wrote made a lot of
sense to me. You helped me more where my understanding was lacking. Thanks
ever so much...
| > I am not sure I understand all the ways
| >Angelique worked on me.
What did you do? I know you sent me energy (Shaktipat) and led me in a
guided meditation, but did you do anything else I am not aware of? I mean
that I noticed some subtle changes in my behaviour, so subtle that my wife
hasn't noticed it yet (though she knows about the chat with you and K
energy). Those changes do not come as a surprise to me... but I was
wondering whether you removed anything or "performed" some operation on some
specific problem.... I am not worrying, just happy and curious.
| >It is still early to say. There was no dramatic change. No cold sweat or
| >anything...
| Lots of heat..
Yes, lots of heat, plus some small changes that I mentioned that I begin to
feel....
| >Is Angelique a recognized guru? :)
| LOL!! Naw, I'm just a crazy ol' Witch.. :)
As you wish! :)
...
But a lovely and loving one! :)
(Is there any of Angelique's slaves on this list with some experience who
could tell me if I am walking along a dangerous path... ;-) )
| >I dreamt:
| >*** (...) ***
| >The fire: no need to say, you all understand! :) It seemed to go out of
| > hand though, so I turned it down. Comment?
| Well, that's pretty clear.. you keep trying to control the fire that
| is burning the trash (karma) away.. you are afraid of having a harsh
| awakening.. afraid the fire will burn out of control.
Only recently did I get worried about the "dangers" of K awakening. For
years before that, K has always meant "good news", something to look forward
to... for the sake of spirituality.
| When you feel the heat, you try to manipulate it, to raise it higher..
| it's not gonna go higher till it's done with burning the root chakra
| trash.
Put this way, it makes sense. But then, I never thought I was being
manipulative. I naturally went on applying the practices I learnt years ago
and that I have often been using since. Besides, it is also what you asked
me to do during the meditation! A part from getting grounded and loving
Earth, you also asked me to imagine the energy rising.
Many trantric or Kundalini yoga practices involve this kind of technique,
where you imagine the energy circulating along certain channels. Are those
kind of practice bad then?
Is it a case of doing certain practices only as long as K is *not* awaken...
but then stop and let K flow on its own when it is???
That is something that I do not really understand intellectually... but I am
aware of the limitations of the intellect. So I trusted you on this one too.
I changed my practice when relaxing in bed. As you asked me, I just stay
grounded, imagine the flow of Love going to Earth, and simply observe the
heat. I observe and try to remain in the present moment. I know it is one of
the manifestation of Goddess. I imagine her and love her.
I must tell you something very interesting (that once more proves you
right!):
The heat was very intense the first two days... until I took that nap and
had that dream I mentioned where I turned down the fire. When I woke up the
heat had indeed died down dramatically. for the next two days I was sorry
not to feel it anymore... but then accepted the fact, in trust that all is
as it should be. Just then, I received your reply. Did you charge it with
more Shakti or it just happens? I felt very hot all over again! Your reply
made a lot of sense to me. You clarified some crucial points. I have been
careful not to do the same mistake again. And the heat is there, throughout
the day but feel it more intensely when reading some mails (yours and
other's) when getting grounded, when relaxing in bed, especially when lying
on my back (comment re lying on back?)
| The alarm clock is about your impatience to become enlightened. That is
| another control issue.
Re: impatience, definitely YES. I am now learning to live more in the
present moment and trust my Inner Mother that all is as it should be.
I was also very impatient to read your reply. I even feared for a while that
you wouldn't (even though you are much quicker to reply than I am myself..
but impatience is not rational!)
When I noticed that and the effect it had on me, I offered it to Goddess. I
remembered your comments about empowerment and someone else's about getting
addicted to Shaktipat. I did not want to rely on you all the time to get my
"dose" of Kundalini. No. I decided to abandon my worries and I started to
really trust. I felt much better. I no longer cared whether you would write
or not. That's not the point. I have my Inner Mother. I don't need Mummy in
Vancouver! (I hope you don't feel rejected, LOL ;-) )
I was all the happier to read your helpful remarks.
| you don't need to know. It's just trash.
Oh! Ok!
| You agreed to surrender. I told you, don't have to do anything
| but that, surrender and stay grounded. Goddess will handle the rest. But
| everytime the K-fire went you work, you meddled with it, trying to make it
| go higher.
I never thought I was breaking any promise by doing that. But now I got the
message all right!
| Goddess was iffy about me meddling with it, but She sure didn't
| want your interfering.
Iffy? really? No wonder you didn't want to proceed without her express
authorization! I understand why you kept asking me : "What did she say? Come
on! Tell me! What did Goddess reply to you?" (quote unashamedly slightly
altered for the sake of ...uh...whatever! ;-) )
You probably asked her for permission before you even started the whole
process. So, tell me, please, what did she tell *you*? Hmm? :)
| Face=social mask of ego. By insisting on control, you broke the
| agreement you made, to be Her slave.
I have been aware all along that my ego is very strong. I understand a bit
how it was interfering in this case. But again, I was not aware that doing
what I was doing was against any agreement.
So now, besides not meddling with K energy but just trust that it is doing
what it has to do, what else specifically does the Slave/Goddess agreement
include?
| >The question remains open as to whether I have fallen in love with
| >Angelique.
| A certain attraction is normal. It's how Goddess makes you pay
| attention.. Don't worry, it will wear off.. :)
I just hope that I am not wearing *you* off! No content to have had a
private four hour long chat session with you (I realized latter that I
prevented you from having breakfast *and* lunch... you must have been
starving) but I also bombard you with emails and questions... ! You are such
a dedicated Lady. You may have a lot of "slaves" but you may sometimes feel
that *you* are a slave to your mission...
| >How on earth did she know I had something on my mind??? ;-)
| Why else would you be waiting for me in the chatroom while I slept?
But you did not know that, did you? At least I did not know you were
sleeping. What an idea to go to bed still logged on the chat room! Maybe it
was all in the cards. That's the way it had to be. I was rewarded for my
determination to be K awakened and my single-mindedness in wanting to try
anything that could help me to get that. For once, I was patient. I did wait
a long time! Never mind the connection cost!
| >About the ongoing poll: are you k awakened?: the day after the session
with
| >Angelique, I changed my vote from: "no but would like to be" to "unsure".
| You are awakened, you were awakened by the Tantra that raised the
| heat.. not by me.
After reading the angelic Message,
That came to me from a lovely Sage,
In Humility and Obedience to Mystress,
In Trust and Love to Goddess,
Forgetting all my past Distress
>From "unsure" to a definite "Yes"
I changed my Vote, absolutely anonymously.
My Destiny, I am now facing courageously!
;)
It is amazing how we like to make life more complicated for ourselves! I
could have entered "yes" in the first place. But No! That would have been
too easy. I had to vote first "No, but would like to be", then "unsure"
before, at last, getting it right!
| I just assisted with some issues.
Yes, precisely, which ones? (we come back to my opening questions).
You can be frank and honest. I don't mind anything to be shared on this
list. No Taboo, no Secrecy. If it can help only one other person on this
list, that would be worth it!
Yours humbly and gratefully,
(wondering how long it will last)
Augustin.
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